New Office Vocabulary
Blamestorming - Sitting around in a group discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed and who was responsible.
Seagull Manager - A manager who flies in, makes a lot of noise, messes up everything, and then leaves.
Blowing Your Buffer - Losing your train of thought.
Chainsaw Consultant - An outside expert brought in to reduce the employee headcount, leaving the brass with clean hands.
CLM (Career-Limiting Move) - Used among microserfs to describe ill-advised activity, e.g., trashing your boss while he or she is within earshot is a serious CLM.
Depotphobia - Fear associated with entering a Costco or Kmart because of how much money one might spend. Electronics geeks experience Shackophobia, Tandyagonia, or Circuit Cityatosis.
Adminisphere - The rarefied organizational layers beginning just above the rank and file. Decisions that fall from the Adminisphere are often profoundly inappropriate or irrelevant to the problems they were designed to solve.
Dilberted - To be exploited and oppressed by your boss.
Derived from the experiences of Dilbert, the geek-in-a-cubicle comic strip character. "I've been dilberted again. The old man revised the specs for the fourth time this week."
Flight Risk - Used to describe employees who are suspected of planning to leave the company or department soon.
404 - Someone who's clueless. From the World Wide Web error message "404 Not Found," meaning that the requested document could not be located. "Don't bother asking him -- he's 404, man."
Generica - Features of the American landscape that are exactly the same no matter where one is, such as fast food joints, strip malls, or housing development subdivisions.
Used as in "We were so lost in Generica that I forgot what city we were in."
GOOD ("Get-Out-Of-Debt") Job - A well-paying job people will take to pay off their debts, which they will quit as soon as they are solvent again.
Keyboard Plaque - The disgusting buildup of dirt and crud found on computer keyboards.
Ohnosecond - That minuscule fraction of time in which you realize that you've just made a BIG mistake.
Percussive Maintenance - The fine art of whacking the daylights out of an electronic device to get it to work again.
Prairie Dogging - When someone yells or drops something loudly in a "cube farm" (an office full of cubicles) and all the co-workers' heads pop up over the walls to see what's going on.
Telephone Number Salary - A salary (or project budget) that has seven digits.
Umfriend - A relationship of dubious standing or a concealed intimate relationship, as in "This is Dale, my...um...friend."
Yuppie Food Stamps - The ubiquitous $20 bills spewed out of ATMs everywhere. Often used when trying to split the bill after a meal: "We owe $8 each, but all anybody's got are yuppie food stamps."
Wednesday, April 25, 2007
Funny Notes (ii)
令人哭笑不得的便条
老师辞职了（理由超级搞笑）
语文老师：上课的时候，有个同学在看杂志，我没收了他的杂志敲了敲他脑袋。可是在我转身准备继续上课的时候，他的同桌竟然哈哈大笑了起来，搞的课都上不下去，我就问他，为什么笑，你知道他是怎么答我的？那小子从抽屉里掏出一本辞海，竟然这样对我说："老师，你还好没发现我看书，要不就被你砸死了～～"
……
数学老师：一个单元考从来不及格的同学竟然能在交上来的作业里用到高中的知识..........我问他这作业是不是他自己做的，那个同学竟然回答我说不知道，你说说看，象话嘛，我就继续问他，要他老实交代，到底是谁帮他做的，嘿，他还倒有理由的，回答我说："老师，我真不知道这作业谁做的，说实话，昨天晚上我比较早睡觉...."
……
物理老师：你知道不知道单单一个顺时针和一个逆时针我就教了几节课？五节课啊！是，我也是这么对他们说的，我告诉他们如果还不明白就看看手表，时针往哪儿走就哪儿就是顺时针，反过来就是逆时针。可是，全班数过去，不是手机就是电子表......
我不辞职我就一学期都教他们这两个词语啊？
…………
体育老师：我为什么不辞职？那帮小子竟然给我送礼物！！不，送礼物没错，我的意思不是说他们送礼物给我就错了，可是他们送礼物给我就是不对。
我怎么越说越糊涂了，这样说吧，虽然我苗条了点，皮肤白了点，可好歹我也是个男教师对吧？可是前几天三八妇女节的时候，那帮小子竟然送了一盒的褪毛霜给我.....还，还，还对我说以后夏天别穿毛裤了，靠，那是我腿毛！
…………
生物老师：我真的不想走啊，可是......你是知道的，我有心脏病，受不了激动，但我能不激动吗？昨天单元考试，根据教学大纲的要求，我让同学们看着教学图片上的鸟腿写出鸟的名称，生活习性。可是我才刚说要考试的内容，就有个同学站了起来往门外走，嘴里囔囔着"靠，这种题目也有，老子不考了...."你说这样的学生要不要教育？我叫住他，问他叫什么名字，他竟然把裤管一拉，把腿露出来对我说："来啊，看着我的腿写出我的名字啊........."
…………
美术老师：你是知道的，我才刚被分配到这个班。昨天上课的时候我才刚进门就听到几个同学大叫"美女"，你说气不气人？我是老师，他们怎么可以这么不尊重老师呢？..是，如果只是因为他们喊我"美女"我就辞职是我不对，可是在我寻找谁喊"美女"的时候，那几个同学又对我喊了一句"看什么看，又不是喊你！"
…………
历史老师：那群学生真的没办法教了，上课的时候我提问题："你们知道武则天是什么人吗？"第一个同学回答我说他和她不熟，第二个同学回答我说是他的一个网友，第三个同学说他有她的ＱＱ号码等下课了上ＱＱ问一下......还一个同学竟然掏出手机竟然说要马上问她！
…………
社会老师：我在讲银行一节时说到，同学们，大家知道米行是卖米的，布行是卖布的，那么大家知道银行吗？所有学生一致大声回答：银行是卖yin的……
地理老师：你自己看看这次他们的试卷吧，我国五大名山之首是赵本山，最著名的江是潘长江，我国的'煤都'是(黑的)，我国的'铁都'是(硬的)，你说我还怎么上课？
……
英语老师：我讲到独立结构的时候，按照教科书要求，我特意教了他们这么一个例句："Ourteacher comes into the classroom,book under
arm"(我们老师夹着本书走进了教室)，可是在考试的时候，全般的同学全部翻译成"老师进了教室，胯下夹着一本书"......
……
音乐老师：我在上课，示范一首歌......唱完后同学们全部鼓掌。我很高兴，我在想，其他老师可能都是教学方法不对....可是他们还没让我想完就给了我否定的答案，他们大喊着："老师，太棒了，你是所有老师里口技最好的，我们第一次听到这么象的鸭叫！"
……
化学老师：我？你在问我？我还没上课呢，不过其他老师都被逼的辞职了，我不辞职我等着去承担他们的痛苦啊
老师辞职了（理由超级搞笑）
语文老师：上课的时候，有个同学在看杂志，我没收了他的杂志敲了敲他脑袋。可是在我转身准备继续上课的时候，他的同桌竟然哈哈大笑了起来，搞的课都上不下去，我就问他，为什么笑，你知道他是怎么答我的？那小子从抽屉里掏出一本辞海，竟然这样对我说："老师，你还好没发现我看书，要不就被你砸死了～～"
……
数学老师：一个单元考从来不及格的同学竟然能在交上来的作业里用到高中的知识..........我问他这作业是不是他自己做的，那个同学竟然回答我说不知道，你说说看，象话嘛，我就继续问他，要他老实交代，到底是谁帮他做的，嘿，他还倒有理由的，回答我说："老师，我真不知道这作业谁做的，说实话，昨天晚上我比较早睡觉...."
……
物理老师：你知道不知道单单一个顺时针和一个逆时针我就教了几节课？五节课啊！是，我也是这么对他们说的，我告诉他们如果还不明白就看看手表，时针往哪儿走就哪儿就是顺时针，反过来就是逆时针。可是，全班数过去，不是手机就是电子表......
我不辞职我就一学期都教他们这两个词语啊？
…………
体育老师：我为什么不辞职？那帮小子竟然给我送礼物！！不，送礼物没错，我的意思不是说他们送礼物给我就错了，可是他们送礼物给我就是不对。
我怎么越说越糊涂了，这样说吧，虽然我苗条了点，皮肤白了点，可好歹我也是个男教师对吧？可是前几天三八妇女节的时候，那帮小子竟然送了一盒的褪毛霜给我.....还，还，还对我说以后夏天别穿毛裤了，靠，那是我腿毛！
…………
生物老师：我真的不想走啊，可是......你是知道的，我有心脏病，受不了激动，但我能不激动吗？昨天单元考试，根据教学大纲的要求，我让同学们看着教学图片上的鸟腿写出鸟的名称，生活习性。可是我才刚说要考试的内容，就有个同学站了起来往门外走，嘴里囔囔着"靠，这种题目也有，老子不考了...."你说这样的学生要不要教育？我叫住他，问他叫什么名字，他竟然把裤管一拉，把腿露出来对我说："来啊，看着我的腿写出我的名字啊........."
…………
美术老师：你是知道的，我才刚被分配到这个班。昨天上课的时候我才刚进门就听到几个同学大叫"美女"，你说气不气人？我是老师，他们怎么可以这么不尊重老师呢？..是，如果只是因为他们喊我"美女"我就辞职是我不对，可是在我寻找谁喊"美女"的时候，那几个同学又对我喊了一句"看什么看，又不是喊你！"
…………
历史老师：那群学生真的没办法教了，上课的时候我提问题："你们知道武则天是什么人吗？"第一个同学回答我说他和她不熟，第二个同学回答我说是他的一个网友，第三个同学说他有她的ＱＱ号码等下课了上ＱＱ问一下......还一个同学竟然掏出手机竟然说要马上问她！
…………
社会老师：我在讲银行一节时说到，同学们，大家知道米行是卖米的，布行是卖布的，那么大家知道银行吗？所有学生一致大声回答：银行是卖yin的……
地理老师：你自己看看这次他们的试卷吧，我国五大名山之首是赵本山，最著名的江是潘长江，我国的'煤都'是(黑的)，我国的'铁都'是(硬的)，你说我还怎么上课？
……
英语老师：我讲到独立结构的时候，按照教科书要求，我特意教了他们这么一个例句："Ourteacher comes into the classroom,book under
arm"(我们老师夹着本书走进了教室)，可是在考试的时候，全般的同学全部翻译成"老师进了教室，胯下夹着一本书"......
……
音乐老师：我在上课，示范一首歌......唱完后同学们全部鼓掌。我很高兴，我在想，其他老师可能都是教学方法不对....可是他们还没让我想完就给了我否定的答案，他们大喊着："老师，太棒了，你是所有老师里口技最好的，我们第一次听到这么象的鸭叫！"
……
化学老师：我？你在问我？我还没上课呢，不过其他老师都被逼的辞职了，我不辞职我等着去承担他们的痛苦啊
Funny Notes (i)
给普通话不标准的总经理：
要叫我提早退休，就实说么！不要老是在公司会议室，叫我是猪生的（资深的）。
——个确定是我娘生的老芋留
给恶心的弟弟：
问你为什么要用5只手指头轮流挖鼻孔时请别回答我说："每只手指头挖起来各有不同的感觉。"
——小鼻孔姊姊留
给伤心欲绝的老板：
公司会倒，我想跟名字也有一点关系吧？
——惠岛有限公司的员工留
给大眼：
请你不要每次都用很羡慕的口吻对我说："眼睛小真好，上课打瞌睡都不会被老师发现！好吗？"
——不知道该可悲还是该庆幸的小眼留
给反应很快的阿婆：
那天您坐在公车上，252司机的紧急刹车，您重心不稳冲了出去，竟问司机："找我有什么事情？"
——觉得你蛮可爱的学生留
给某超速驾驶员：
我把你拦下来，要你交出驾照，你反而马上把车开走。再度拦下你，你却回答："你不是叫我先走（闽南语）？"
——彻底被你打败的交警留
给8岁的女儿：
请别在大庭广众之下问我："妈，我的'保险套'呢？"天哪！那个叫做"装保险单的大套子"，OK？
——当场很想消失的妈妈留
给初玩股票的美眉：
股票只有上市及上柜两种，别跟我说要'下柜'的好吗？
——哭笑不得的营业员留
给恶心的萍：
当我问你要不要吃猪肠时，请不要回答我："我不敢吃，我怕吃到蛔虫。"
——正在吃猪肠，却想去厕所吐的苹留
给表达不佳的琳：
虽然你的语文能力不好，但请不要离谱地告诉我："阿琪他爷爷有一次死掉……"
——认为人只能死一次的璇留
给天才儿子：
虽然你放屁怕同学闻到，但我不认为你低头猛吸，就可以把屁味吸光。
——怀疑你考语文总是100分的妈妈留
给亲爱的学生：
虽然教官我真的很忙，但在厕所看到我，请别向我说："教官，这么忙还自己来上厕所啊！"
——不认为别人可以代替的教官留
给从没捐过血的大牛：
当你收到捐血报告书时，请不要大声嚷嚷，它把你的血打零分（O）而我的血是A！
——被你彻底打败的捐血人小明留
要叫我提早退休，就实说么！不要老是在公司会议室，叫我是猪生的（资深的）。
——个确定是我娘生的老芋留
给恶心的弟弟：
问你为什么要用5只手指头轮流挖鼻孔时请别回答我说："每只手指头挖起来各有不同的感觉。"
——小鼻孔姊姊留
给伤心欲绝的老板：
公司会倒，我想跟名字也有一点关系吧？
——惠岛有限公司的员工留
给大眼：
请你不要每次都用很羡慕的口吻对我说："眼睛小真好，上课打瞌睡都不会被老师发现！好吗？"
——不知道该可悲还是该庆幸的小眼留
给反应很快的阿婆：
那天您坐在公车上，252司机的紧急刹车，您重心不稳冲了出去，竟问司机："找我有什么事情？"
——觉得你蛮可爱的学生留
给某超速驾驶员：
我把你拦下来，要你交出驾照，你反而马上把车开走。再度拦下你，你却回答："你不是叫我先走（闽南语）？"
——彻底被你打败的交警留
给8岁的女儿：
请别在大庭广众之下问我："妈，我的'保险套'呢？"天哪！那个叫做"装保险单的大套子"，OK？
——当场很想消失的妈妈留
给初玩股票的美眉：
股票只有上市及上柜两种，别跟我说要'下柜'的好吗？
——哭笑不得的营业员留
给恶心的萍：
当我问你要不要吃猪肠时，请不要回答我："我不敢吃，我怕吃到蛔虫。"
——正在吃猪肠，却想去厕所吐的苹留
给表达不佳的琳：
虽然你的语文能力不好，但请不要离谱地告诉我："阿琪他爷爷有一次死掉……"
——认为人只能死一次的璇留
给天才儿子：
虽然你放屁怕同学闻到，但我不认为你低头猛吸，就可以把屁味吸光。
——怀疑你考语文总是100分的妈妈留
给亲爱的学生：
虽然教官我真的很忙，但在厕所看到我，请别向我说："教官，这么忙还自己来上厕所啊！"
——不认为别人可以代替的教官留
给从没捐过血的大牛：
当你收到捐血报告书时，请不要大声嚷嚷，它把你的血打零分（O）而我的血是A！
——被你彻底打败的捐血人小明留
Five Principles for Happiness in 2007
Five Principles for Happiness in 2007
by David Bach
Tuesday, January 2, 2007
The arrival of the new year marks a symbolic time for fresh starts. Many of us take it as an opportunity to set goals, contemplate decisions, and renew commitments. It's special because of the revitalized sense of hope it brings.
Before you make your New Year's resolutions for 2007, I'd like to share some thoughts about how it's never too late to start living a rich life.
The Live Rich Factor
Most people believe that if they just had more money, the things that make them unhappy would disappear and their lives would be better. The truth is that your life can be better without more money. It can be better today, but you need to make some decisions and take some actions.
You don't need me to tell you what will make you happy -- only you know that truth.
I believe each of us has the power to discover our purpose and become joyful in the process of journeying toward that purpose. It's not easy, however. Nothing important and meaningful ever is.
What you need to do is create what I call the "Live Rich Factor" in your life. I call it this because those who find the purpose that leads them to joy are truly the luckiest people in the world, because they're living richly.
There are five basic principles involved in creating your Live Rich Factor:
Principle 1: Give Yourself a Break
We all tell ourselves the story of the one that got away. You can't move forward if you spend time focusing on what you shoulda-woulda-coulda done in 2006 or before. It's over, and its time to move on. The fastest way I know to do this is to write all of your regrets down on paper.
Make a list of all your personal and financial if-onlys. For example, "If only I had saved more money. If only I hadn't quit that job. If only I hadn't taken the job I have." You get the idea.
After reading the list aloud to yourself, get rid of it. Let it all go by literally burning the list (safely). Now you're ready for a fresh start in 2007 -- a new beginning.
Principle 2: Get Connected with Your Truth
The hardest thing to do is be honest with yourself. Asking yourself some key questions will lead you to some amazing discoveries, and possibly motivate you to do what it takes to create the life you envision for yourself.
I suggest writing your (honest) answers to the following questions in a new journal for the new year:
Principle 3: Stop Judging Yourself
Be nicer to yourself in 2007. Many people talk to themselves in a way they would never accept from a stranger, friend, or loved one. If this describes you, try stopping the negative conversations you have with yourself immediately.
For one week, simply commit to saying "stop it" when you think a negative thought about yourself. If you're in the habit of saying negative things to yourself, you'll find this is one of the most difficult exercises you'll ever do. Carry a notepad with you and make a mark each time you catch yourself thinking negatively. You'll find that as the days go by, your negative thinking can quickly be reduced.
Principle 4: Stop Judging Others
It's hard to be joyful when you're always judging others. In fact, it's close to impossible. Judging others creates a huge amount of stress in our lives. It affects our marriages and our relationships with our kids as well as the way we relate to friends, co-workers, and society in general.
We're not here to judge one another.
The next time you find yourself upset at someone or some situation, catch yourself and ask, "Are you judging?" Judging others is often an unconscious habit. But it's a habit that can be changed the moment you decide to stop doing it.
Principle 5 : Pursue Fun with a Vengeance
It's OK to pursue fun. It's what children do. My greatest joy these days is the simple pleasure of playing with my three-year-old son, Jack.
This holiday season with Jack taught me the simple power of pursuing fun -- again and again. What was fun for Jack this Christmas? It turns out it wasn't the Big Wheel that my wife, Michelle, and I stayed up so late building on Christmas Eve. And it wasn't the Star Wars Lego toy (although he was pretty excited about that).
Instead, what Jack found the most fun was a new game I made up to keep him entertained. The game was called Geronimo -- and it involved Jack jumping from the bed onto a stack of pillows yelling "Geronimo!" This silly little game ended up bringing us both hours of fun. The price of the game: nothing. The fun: priceless. And the laughs? Endless.
Why do we stop pursing fun as we get older? Fun shouldn't be squeezed into a few weeks of vacation each year. And it shouldn't be squeezed into the last chapter of your life when you "get to" retire. Fun deserves to be a part of your life now -- in 2007.
But fun doesn't just happen. You have to make it a priority in your life or it'll go missing. Life's too short to not have it.
So here's to a fun, happy, and healthy New Year. Cheers!
http://finance.yahoo.com/expert/article/millionaire/18930;_ylt=Av_8rC9rriuqQVJrkDiH7uxIt9IF
by David Bach
Tuesday, January 2, 2007
The arrival of the new year marks a symbolic time for fresh starts. Many of us take it as an opportunity to set goals, contemplate decisions, and renew commitments. It's special because of the revitalized sense of hope it brings.
Before you make your New Year's resolutions for 2007, I'd like to share some thoughts about how it's never too late to start living a rich life.
The Live Rich Factor
Most people believe that if they just had more money, the things that make them unhappy would disappear and their lives would be better. The truth is that your life can be better without more money. It can be better today, but you need to make some decisions and take some actions.
You don't need me to tell you what will make you happy -- only you know that truth.
I believe each of us has the power to discover our purpose and become joyful in the process of journeying toward that purpose. It's not easy, however. Nothing important and meaningful ever is.
What you need to do is create what I call the "Live Rich Factor" in your life. I call it this because those who find the purpose that leads them to joy are truly the luckiest people in the world, because they're living richly.
There are five basic principles involved in creating your Live Rich Factor:
Principle 1: Give Yourself a Break
We all tell ourselves the story of the one that got away. You can't move forward if you spend time focusing on what you shoulda-woulda-coulda done in 2006 or before. It's over, and its time to move on. The fastest way I know to do this is to write all of your regrets down on paper.
Make a list of all your personal and financial if-onlys. For example, "If only I had saved more money. If only I hadn't quit that job. If only I hadn't taken the job I have." You get the idea.
After reading the list aloud to yourself, get rid of it. Let it all go by literally burning the list (safely). Now you're ready for a fresh start in 2007 -- a new beginning.
Principle 2: Get Connected with Your Truth
The hardest thing to do is be honest with yourself. Asking yourself some key questions will lead you to some amazing discoveries, and possibly motivate you to do what it takes to create the life you envision for yourself.
I suggest writing your (honest) answers to the following questions in a new journal for the new year:
- What makes you happy at work?
- What makes you happy at home?
- What makes you happy with your friends and family?
- What makes you happy when you're by yourself?
- What do you love to do?
- What would you do with your life today if you weren't afraid of failure?
- What's not working in your life?
- What are you currently doing that prevents you from experiencing joy?
- What's working in your life?
- Who's not working in your life?
- Who in your life is subtracting value from and adding misery to it?
- Can you fix any of these relationships, or should you let them go from your life?
- What relationships are working in your life?
- If we were getting together one year from today, what would have to happen for you to be able to tell me that you now have more joy in your life?
- What's the single most important thing you've learned about yourself as a result of answering these questions?
Principle 3: Stop Judging Yourself
Be nicer to yourself in 2007. Many people talk to themselves in a way they would never accept from a stranger, friend, or loved one. If this describes you, try stopping the negative conversations you have with yourself immediately.
For one week, simply commit to saying "stop it" when you think a negative thought about yourself. If you're in the habit of saying negative things to yourself, you'll find this is one of the most difficult exercises you'll ever do. Carry a notepad with you and make a mark each time you catch yourself thinking negatively. You'll find that as the days go by, your negative thinking can quickly be reduced.
Principle 4: Stop Judging Others
It's hard to be joyful when you're always judging others. In fact, it's close to impossible. Judging others creates a huge amount of stress in our lives. It affects our marriages and our relationships with our kids as well as the way we relate to friends, co-workers, and society in general.
We're not here to judge one another.
The next time you find yourself upset at someone or some situation, catch yourself and ask, "Are you judging?" Judging others is often an unconscious habit. But it's a habit that can be changed the moment you decide to stop doing it.
Principle 5 : Pursue Fun with a Vengeance
It's OK to pursue fun. It's what children do. My greatest joy these days is the simple pleasure of playing with my three-year-old son, Jack.
This holiday season with Jack taught me the simple power of pursuing fun -- again and again. What was fun for Jack this Christmas? It turns out it wasn't the Big Wheel that my wife, Michelle, and I stayed up so late building on Christmas Eve. And it wasn't the Star Wars Lego toy (although he was pretty excited about that).
Instead, what Jack found the most fun was a new game I made up to keep him entertained. The game was called Geronimo -- and it involved Jack jumping from the bed onto a stack of pillows yelling "Geronimo!" This silly little game ended up bringing us both hours of fun. The price of the game: nothing. The fun: priceless. And the laughs? Endless.
Why do we stop pursing fun as we get older? Fun shouldn't be squeezed into a few weeks of vacation each year. And it shouldn't be squeezed into the last chapter of your life when you "get to" retire. Fun deserves to be a part of your life now -- in 2007.
But fun doesn't just happen. You have to make it a priority in your life or it'll go missing. Life's too short to not have it.
So here's to a fun, happy, and healthy New Year. Cheers!
http://finance.yahoo.com/expert/article/millionaire/18930;_ylt=Av_8rC9rriuqQVJrkDiH7uxIt9IF
Monday, April 23, 2007
Think and review
Sub: Think and review............
There was a blind girl who hated herself just because she's blind.
She hated everyone, except her loving boyfriend. He's always there for her. She said that if she could only see the world, she would marry her boyfriend.
One day, someone donated a pair of eyes to her and then she can see everything, including her boyfriend.
Her boyfriend asked her, "now that you can see the world, will you marry me?" The girl was shocked when she saw that her boyfriend is blind too, and refused to marry him.
Her boyfriend walked away in tears, and later wrote a letter to her saying. "Just take care of my eyes dear."
This is how human brain changes when the status changed.
Only few remember what life was before, and who's always been there even in the most painful situations.
Sub: Life Is A Gift
Today before you think of saying an unkind word. Think of someone who can't speak.
Before you complain about the taste of your food. Think of someone who has nothing to eat.
Before you complain about your husband or wife. Think of someone who's crying out to God for a companion.
Today before you complain about life. Think of someone who went too early to heaven.
Before you complain about your children. Think of someone who desires children but they're barren.
Before you argue about your dirty house, someone didn't clean or sweep. Think of the people who are living in the streets.
Before whining about the distance you drive. Think of someone who walks the same distance with their feet.
And when you are tired and complain about your job. Think of the unemployed, the disabled and those who wished they had your job.
But before you think of pointing the finger or condemning another. Remember that not one of us are without sin and we all answer to one maker.
And when depressing thoughts seem to get you down Put a smile on your face and thank God you're alive and still around.
Life is a gift, Live it, Enjoy it, Celebrate it
EMBRACE IT
And fulfill it
And while you are at it give love to someone today. Love someone with what you do and the words you say. Love is not meant to be kept locked inside of us and hidden
So give it away "Give Love to someone today!" Remember to live each day to the fullest.
There was a blind girl who hated herself just because she's blind.
She hated everyone, except her loving boyfriend. He's always there for her. She said that if she could only see the world, she would marry her boyfriend.
One day, someone donated a pair of eyes to her and then she can see everything, including her boyfriend.
Her boyfriend asked her, "now that you can see the world, will you marry me?" The girl was shocked when she saw that her boyfriend is blind too, and refused to marry him.
Her boyfriend walked away in tears, and later wrote a letter to her saying. "Just take care of my eyes dear."
This is how human brain changes when the status changed.
Only few remember what life was before, and who's always been there even in the most painful situations.
Sub: Life Is A Gift
Today before you think of saying an unkind word. Think of someone who can't speak.
Before you complain about the taste of your food. Think of someone who has nothing to eat.
Before you complain about your husband or wife. Think of someone who's crying out to God for a companion.
Today before you complain about life. Think of someone who went too early to heaven.
Before you complain about your children. Think of someone who desires children but they're barren.
Before you argue about your dirty house, someone didn't clean or sweep. Think of the people who are living in the streets.
Before whining about the distance you drive. Think of someone who walks the same distance with their feet.
And when you are tired and complain about your job. Think of the unemployed, the disabled and those who wished they had your job.
But before you think of pointing the finger or condemning another. Remember that not one of us are without sin and we all answer to one maker.
And when depressing thoughts seem to get you down Put a smile on your face and thank God you're alive and still around.
Life is a gift, Live it, Enjoy it, Celebrate it
EMBRACE IT
And fulfill it
And while you are at it give love to someone today. Love someone with what you do and the words you say. Love is not meant to be kept locked inside of us and hidden
So give it away "Give Love to someone today!" Remember to live each day to the fullest.
40
1
男人是上帝根据世界的需要而创造的；
女人是上帝根据男人的需要而创造的
2
男人爱上女人后， 他会做诗
女人爱上男人后， 她会做梦
3
女人对男人往往会朝思暮想
男人对女人往往会朝秦暮楚
4
女人的看家本领是撒娇；
男人的拿手好戏是撒谎
5
女人的幸福在于：他真的爱我；
男人的幸福在于：她值得我爱
6
女人应该有丰满的胸脯；
男人应该有丰满的腰包
7
女人吻男人算是一种幸福；
男人吻女人算是一种口福
8
当女人走投无路的时候，她会和一个男人结婚；
当男人走投无路的时候， 一个女人会和他离婚
9
聪明的女人会嫁给爱她的男人做老婆；
愚蠢的女人会嫁给她爱的男人做老婆
10
做情人的时候， 女人会让男人心疼；
做妻子的时候， 女人会让男人头疼
11
少女习惯用眼神征服男人；
少妇习惯用眼泪征服男人
12
为女人发誓的男人是可笑的
为女人发财的男人是可爱的
13
男人要是提出离婚， 往往是他已经不喜欢她的妻子了
女人要是提出离婚， 往往是她丈夫已经不喜欢她了
14
女人坚持独身， 人们会认为她有毛病；
男人坚持独身， 人们会认为他有事业心。
而实际情况是:
15
女人坚持独身是因为找不到好对象，
男人坚持独身是因为找不到对象
16
女人习惯把赌注押在爱情上；
男人习惯把赌注押在婚姻上；
17
女人能够忍受不幸的婚姻， 不能忍受不幸的爱情；
男人能够忍受不幸的爱情， 不能忍受不幸的婚姻
18
一个忧郁的女人背后必然有一段不幸的爱
一个憔悴的男人的背后必然有一桩不幸的婚姻
19
女人再婚是为了赌气；
男人再婚是为了碰运气
20
女人总是希望她是他的最后一个女人；
男人总是希望他是她的第一个男人...
21
女人姣好的长相，使男人迅速坠入情网
男人的甜言蜜语，使女人乐于被拉下爱河。
22
男人追求女人，如隔着一座山；
女人追求男人，如隔着一层纸。
尽管如此，实际生活中:
23
男人往往能追到他喜欢的女人，
而女人却得不到她爱恋的男人，
原因是：
24
男人不怕翻山越岭，
女人却怕伤了手指头。
25
男人获得爱的方式是迅速出击，在燃烧中拥抱爱的烈焰；
女人获得爱的方法是缓慢地渗透，然后在平静中品尝爱的芬芳。
26
化妆品对女人而言，是信心。
对男人而言，是幻觉。
27
男人热恋时聪明之级；
女人热恋时却愚蠢无比。
28
男人考验女人的方法是远走高飞；
女人考验男人的方式是约会迟到。
29
男人为结婚而恋爱；
女人为爱情而结婚。
30
男人酒后话多，
女人婚后话多。
31
男人恋爱希望把复杂的过程弄简单，
女人恋爱喜欢将简单的事情弄复杂。
32
男人无情地把初恋情人当做一次性饮料，满足渴望后毫不吝啬地扔掉，
女人深情地把初恋情人当做哺育成人的乳汁，一辈子品尝他的回味。
33
男人选择女人，目光瞄准脸蛋，
女人选择男人，心思放在钱包。
34
男人恋爱是因为无事可做，
女人恋爱是因为好奇心驱使。 结果是男人烦恼女人失望。
35
男人希望女友经历越少越好，
女人却希望男友经历越多越好。
36
男人恋爱时用眼，
女人恋爱时用心。
37
男人的眼睛靠辐射，
而女人的心靠传导。
38
男人喜欢放出诱饵垂钓爱情，
女人喜欢不惜血本守望爱情。
39
男人恋爱后变得可怜巴巴，
女人恋爱后变得神经兮兮。
40
女人恋爱期间渴望对方裸露心灵，
男人恋爱期间渴望对方裸露身体。
男人是上帝根据世界的需要而创造的；
女人是上帝根据男人的需要而创造的
2
男人爱上女人后， 他会做诗
女人爱上男人后， 她会做梦
3
女人对男人往往会朝思暮想
男人对女人往往会朝秦暮楚
4
女人的看家本领是撒娇；
男人的拿手好戏是撒谎
5
女人的幸福在于：他真的爱我；
男人的幸福在于：她值得我爱
6
女人应该有丰满的胸脯；
男人应该有丰满的腰包
7
女人吻男人算是一种幸福；
男人吻女人算是一种口福
8
当女人走投无路的时候，她会和一个男人结婚；
当男人走投无路的时候， 一个女人会和他离婚
9
聪明的女人会嫁给爱她的男人做老婆；
愚蠢的女人会嫁给她爱的男人做老婆
10
做情人的时候， 女人会让男人心疼；
做妻子的时候， 女人会让男人头疼
11
少女习惯用眼神征服男人；
少妇习惯用眼泪征服男人
12
为女人发誓的男人是可笑的
为女人发财的男人是可爱的
13
男人要是提出离婚， 往往是他已经不喜欢她的妻子了
女人要是提出离婚， 往往是她丈夫已经不喜欢她了
14
女人坚持独身， 人们会认为她有毛病；
男人坚持独身， 人们会认为他有事业心。
而实际情况是:
15
女人坚持独身是因为找不到好对象，
男人坚持独身是因为找不到对象
16
女人习惯把赌注押在爱情上；
男人习惯把赌注押在婚姻上；
17
女人能够忍受不幸的婚姻， 不能忍受不幸的爱情；
男人能够忍受不幸的爱情， 不能忍受不幸的婚姻
18
一个忧郁的女人背后必然有一段不幸的爱
一个憔悴的男人的背后必然有一桩不幸的婚姻
19
女人再婚是为了赌气；
男人再婚是为了碰运气
20
女人总是希望她是他的最后一个女人；
男人总是希望他是她的第一个男人...
21
女人姣好的长相，使男人迅速坠入情网
男人的甜言蜜语，使女人乐于被拉下爱河。
22
男人追求女人，如隔着一座山；
女人追求男人，如隔着一层纸。
尽管如此，实际生活中:
23
男人往往能追到他喜欢的女人，
而女人却得不到她爱恋的男人，
原因是：
24
男人不怕翻山越岭，
女人却怕伤了手指头。
25
男人获得爱的方式是迅速出击，在燃烧中拥抱爱的烈焰；
女人获得爱的方法是缓慢地渗透，然后在平静中品尝爱的芬芳。
26
化妆品对女人而言，是信心。
对男人而言，是幻觉。
27
男人热恋时聪明之级；
女人热恋时却愚蠢无比。
28
男人考验女人的方法是远走高飞；
女人考验男人的方式是约会迟到。
29
男人为结婚而恋爱；
女人为爱情而结婚。
30
男人酒后话多，
女人婚后话多。
31
男人恋爱希望把复杂的过程弄简单，
女人恋爱喜欢将简单的事情弄复杂。
32
男人无情地把初恋情人当做一次性饮料，满足渴望后毫不吝啬地扔掉，
女人深情地把初恋情人当做哺育成人的乳汁，一辈子品尝他的回味。
33
男人选择女人，目光瞄准脸蛋，
女人选择男人，心思放在钱包。
34
男人恋爱是因为无事可做，
女人恋爱是因为好奇心驱使。 结果是男人烦恼女人失望。
35
男人希望女友经历越少越好，
女人却希望男友经历越多越好。
36
男人恋爱时用眼，
女人恋爱时用心。
37
男人的眼睛靠辐射，
而女人的心靠传导。
38
男人喜欢放出诱饵垂钓爱情，
女人喜欢不惜血本守望爱情。
39
男人恋爱后变得可怜巴巴，
女人恋爱后变得神经兮兮。
40
女人恋爱期间渴望对方裸露心灵，
男人恋爱期间渴望对方裸露身体。
Read Each One Carefully and Think About It a Second or Two
Read Each One Carefully and Think About It a Second or Two
小心讀每一個，再用一兩秒想一想
1. I love you not because of who you are, but because of who I am when I am with you.
我愛你不是因為你是誰，而是我在你面前可以是誰。
2. No man or woman is worth your tears, and the one who is, won't make you cry.
沒有男人或女人是值得你為他流眼淚，值得的那一位，不會要你哭。
3. Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to, doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.
那人不是你所想般愛你，但不代表那人不是全心全意地愛你。
4. A true friend is someone who reaches for your hand and touches your heart.
一個真正的朋友是向著你伸手，觸動你心靈的人。
5. The worst way to miss someone is to be sitting right beside them knowing you can't have them.
掛念一個人最差的方式，就是你坐在他身旁，而知道你不能擁有他。
6. Never frown, even when you are sad, because you never know who is falling in love with your smile.
就算你不快樂也不要皺眉，因為你永不知道誰會愛上你的笑容。
7. To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world.
在世界裡你可能只是某人，但對某人你可能是全世界。
8. Don't waste your time on a man/woman, who isn't willing to waste their time on you.
不要花時間在一個不會花時間在你身上的人。
9. Maybe God wants us to meet a few wrong people before meeting the right one, so that when we finally meet the person, we will know how to be grateful.
可能神要我們在遇到那位對的人之前先遇上一些錯的人，讓我們遇到那位對先生/對小姐時懂得珍惜。
10. Don't cry because it is over, smile because it happened.
不要因為完結而哭，要為曾經發生而微笑。
11. There's always going to be people that hurt you so what you have to do is keep on trusting and just be more careful about who you trust next time around.
這個世界永遠也會有一些傷害你的人，你要做的就是繼續去信人和小心你下次信的人。
12. Make yourself a better person and know who you are before you try and know someone else and expect them to know you.
在你嘗試了解其他人和盼望其他人明白你之前，先把你自己變成一個更好的人和了解你自己。
13. Don't try so hard, the best things come when you least expect them to.
不要太努力去找，最好的東西是在你最預計不到的時候出現。
REMEMBER: WHATEVER HAPPENS, HAPPENS FOR A REASON.
緊記: 所有事也是因果循環的。
小心讀每一個，再用一兩秒想一想
1. I love you not because of who you are, but because of who I am when I am with you.
我愛你不是因為你是誰，而是我在你面前可以是誰。
2. No man or woman is worth your tears, and the one who is, won't make you cry.
沒有男人或女人是值得你為他流眼淚，值得的那一位，不會要你哭。
3. Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to, doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.
那人不是你所想般愛你，但不代表那人不是全心全意地愛你。
4. A true friend is someone who reaches for your hand and touches your heart.
一個真正的朋友是向著你伸手，觸動你心靈的人。
5. The worst way to miss someone is to be sitting right beside them knowing you can't have them.
掛念一個人最差的方式，就是你坐在他身旁，而知道你不能擁有他。
6. Never frown, even when you are sad, because you never know who is falling in love with your smile.
就算你不快樂也不要皺眉，因為你永不知道誰會愛上你的笑容。
7. To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world.
在世界裡你可能只是某人，但對某人你可能是全世界。
8. Don't waste your time on a man/woman, who isn't willing to waste their time on you.
不要花時間在一個不會花時間在你身上的人。
9. Maybe God wants us to meet a few wrong people before meeting the right one, so that when we finally meet the person, we will know how to be grateful.
可能神要我們在遇到那位對的人之前先遇上一些錯的人，讓我們遇到那位對先生/對小姐時懂得珍惜。
10. Don't cry because it is over, smile because it happened.
不要因為完結而哭，要為曾經發生而微笑。
11. There's always going to be people that hurt you so what you have to do is keep on trusting and just be more careful about who you trust next time around.
這個世界永遠也會有一些傷害你的人，你要做的就是繼續去信人和小心你下次信的人。
12. Make yourself a better person and know who you are before you try and know someone else and expect them to know you.
在你嘗試了解其他人和盼望其他人明白你之前，先把你自己變成一個更好的人和了解你自己。
13. Don't try so hard, the best things come when you least expect them to.
不要太努力去找，最好的東西是在你最預計不到的時候出現。
REMEMBER: WHATEVER HAPPENS, HAPPENS FOR A REASON.
緊記: 所有事也是因果循環的。
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