The 3 Fs

3 men were walking on a wall.
Feeling, faith and fact.
When feeling had an awful fall and faith was taken back.
So close to faith was feeling he stumbled and fell too.
But fact remained and pulled faith back and faith brought feeling too.

--anonymous

Motivate Dec 05

1.我爱你并不是因为你是谁，而是因为我在你身边的时候我是谁
I love you not for who you are, but who I am when I'm by your side

2.没有人值得你流泪，值得你流泪的人是不会让你哭的
No person deserves your tears, and who deserves them won't make you cry

3.只因为某人不如你所愿爱你，并不意味着你不被别人所爱
Just because someone doesn’t love you as you wish, it doesn’t means you are not love with all his/her being

4.一个真正的朋友会握着你的手，触动你的心
A true friend is the one who holds your hand and touches your heart

5.错过一个人最可怕的方式就是：坐在他/她身边，你却永远都不会拥有他/她
The worst way to miss someone is to be seated by his/her side and know you never have his/her

6.永远都不要停止微笑，即使在是你难过的时候，说不定有人会因为你的笑容而爱上你
Never stop smiling, not even when you're sad, someone might fall in love your smile

7.你可能只是这世界上的一个人，但对于某人来说，你就是全世界
You may only a person in this world, but for someone you are the world

8.不要把时间花在一个不在乎与你一起分享的人身上
Don't spend time with someone who doesn't care spending with you

9.也许上帝在让你遇见那个合适的人之前会让你遇到很多错误的人，所以，当这一切发生的时候，你该心存感激
Maybe God wants you to meet many wrong people before you meet the right one, so when this happen, you'll be thankful

10.不要因为它的结束而哭，应当为它的发生而笑
Don't cry because it came to an end, just smile because it happened

11.生活中总会有伤害你的人，所以你仍然需要继续相信别人，只是小心些而已
There will always be people who'll hurt you, so you need to continue trusting, just be careful

12.做一个更好的人，确信在遇见一个新的人之前知道自己是谁，也希望那个人知道你是谁
Become a better person and but sure to know who you are before meeting someone new and hoping that person knows you are.

Chinese Name to avoid

Chinese Jokes Dec05

手术室里最吓人的20句话 ！

1, 哇，搞半天他是个男人！

2、我嘴里的烟头那里去了？

3、拿斧子来！

4、听说最近肾脏很值钱！

5、这跳动的是心脏还是肺！

6、着根肠子原本的位置在哪！

7、大家休息一下，再接着来做手术。

8、这个病人是什么血型来着。

9、怎么会停电了！

10、大家下班吧！

11、XX，还要重新开刀，我的剪刀不见了！

12、划什么口子好看呢？

13、喂，你从他肚子里拿走了什么东西？

14、快去拿书来，我忘了这个器官叫什么！

15、算了，算了，凑和着缝上吧！

16、这家伙只给100元红包！

17、这刀怎么这么钝，还要再划一次！

18、不是吧，怎么多了个器官，这器官放哪？

19、去拿块猪皮来。

20、现在才2点，再混几个小时就下班了！

Ten Commandments for Peace of Mind

How to attain at mental peace

1. Do not interfere in others' business unless asked
Most of us create our own problems by interfering too often in others' affairs. We do so because somehow we have convinced ourselves that our way is the best way, our logic is the perfect logic, and those who do not conform to our thinking must be criticized and steered to the right direction, our direction.

This kind of attitude on our part denies the existence of individuality and consequently the existence of God, for God has created each one of us in a unique way. No two human beings can think or act in exactly the same way. All men or women act the way they do because they are prompted to do so by the Divine within them. There is God to look after everything. Why are you bothered? Mind your own business and you will have your peace.

2. Forget and forgive
This is the most powerful aid to peace of mind. We often nurture ill feeling inside our heart for the person who insults or harms us. We foster grievances, which in turn results in loss of sleep, develops of stomach ulcer, high blood pressure and many other ailments that stealthily gnaws us from within.

We forget that the insult or injury was done to us once but by nourishing the grievance we go on excavating the wound forever. Therefore it is essential that we cultivate the art of forgiving and forgetting. Believe in the justice of God and the doctrine of Karma. Let Him judge the act of the one who insulted you. Life is too short to waste in such trifles. Forget, forgive, and march on.

3. Do not crave for recognition
This world is full of selfish people. They seldom praise anybody without selfish motive. They may praise you today because you are rich and have power but no sooner you are powerless, they will forget your achievement and start criticizing you.

Moreover, each person is a mortal with a bundle of defects in them. No one individual is picture perfect. Then why do you value the words of praise of another mortal like you? Why do you crave for such false recognition and lose your peace of mind if the world does not praise you? Believe in yourself. People's praises do not last long and are not worth it. Do your duties ethically and sincerely and leave the rest to God.

4. Do not be jealous
We all have experienced how jealousy can disturb our peace of mind. You know you work harder than your colleagues in the office but they get promotions, you do not. You started a business several years ago but you are not as successful as your neighbor whose business is only one year old. There are several examples like these in every walk of life. Should you be jealous? No, remember everybody's life is shaped by his previous Karma that has now become his destiny. If you are destined to be rich, not all the world can stop you. If you are not so destined, no one can help you either. Nothing will be gained by blaming others for your misfortune. Jealousy will not get you anywhere, but will only give you restlessness.

5. Change yourself according to the environment
If you try to change the environment single handedly, the chances are you may fail. Instead, change yourself to suit the environment. As you do this, even the environment, which has remained unfriendly for you, will mysteriously appear to be congenial and harmonious.

6. Endure what cannot be cured
This is the best way to turn a disadvantage into an advantage. Every day we face numerous inconveniences, ailments, irritations and accidents that are beyond our control. We must learn to put up with these things. We must learn to endure them cheerfully thinking, "God will it so, so be it". God's logic is beyond our comprehension. Believe it and you will gain in patience, in inner strength, in will power.

7. Do not bite more than you can chew
This maxim should be always remembered. We often tend to take more responsibilities than we are capable to carry out. This is done to satisfy our ego. Know your limitations. Why take on additional loads that may create more worries? You cannot gain peace of mind by expanding your external activities. If you have extra time, then spend it in an inward life of prayer, introspection and meditation. This will reduce those thoughts in your mind, which make you restless. Fewer the thoughts, greater is the peace of mind.

8. Meditate regularly
Meditation makes the mind thoughtless. This is the highest state of peace of mind. Try and experience it. If you meditate earnestly for half an hour every day, you will tend to become calm during the remaining twenty-three and a half hours. Your mind will not be disturbed as much as before. You must gradually increase the period of daily meditation. You may think this will interfere with your daily work. On the contrary, this will increase your efficiency and you will turn out more work in less time.

9. Never leave the mind vacant
Empty mind is the devil's workshop. All evil deeds start in the mind. Keep your mind occupied in something positive, something worthwhile. Actively follow a hobby. Do something that holds your interest. You must decide what you value more - money or peace of mind. Your hobby, like social work or temple work may not always earn you more money, but you will have a sense of fulfillment and achievement. Even if you are resting physically, occupy yourself in healthy reading or mental chanting of God's name (japa).

10. Do not procrastinate and never regret
Do not waste time in wondering "should I or shouldn't I?" Days, weeks, months and years may be wasted in that futile mental debating. You can never plan enough because you can never anticipate all future happenings. Always remember God has His own plan too. Value your time and do things. It does not matter if you fail the first time. You can rectify your mistakes and succeed the next time. Sitting back and worrying will lead to nothing. Learn from your mistakes but do not brood over the past. DO NOT REGRET! Whatever happened was destined to happen only that way. Take it as the will of God. You do not have the power to alter the course of God's will. Why cry over the spilt milk?

BY SHRI GYAN RAJHANS
http://hinduism.about.com/library/weekly/aa060902a.htm

Leet

Leet is the all-alpha translation of "l33t" (the "3" is represented as a backwards "E"), broken down as "l" and "33t," and thus "elite." "leet" doesn't exactly become "elite" until you know how it breaks down. It is an online culture or attitude sometimes identified by frequent use of leetspeak (l33t5p34k, 133t, 1337, or l33t).


Example
# "WHeRE @Re J00" or "Wh3re aer j00?" for "where are you"
# "wH4+'S j00R nAME" for "what is your name"

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Leet

m i a noob?

A newbie (also spelled noob, newb, or n00b in the leetspeak of internet culture) is a to a particular field, the term being commonly used on the internet, where it might refer to new users of a game, a newsgroup, the World Wide Web itself, or an operating system.
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Noob

Got to be a noobs or just another idiot. My driving license expired and yet I don't know about it, then I was driving without license for about 2 months. One day my father ask me about my driving license when I was planning to drive long distance, to my surprise, it has been expired. Quite fortunate that no police officer stops and checks my license.

Fancy Stuff - Dec 2005

Fancy Lighting Feeds the Consumer
Vlacom outdoors has introduced these new lighting posters to help the sale of liquor (like it needed it) and other goods. These lighting techniques will be used on the massive advertising billboards and such. It is already being used in the Netherlands to sell Netherlands stuff.


iPod nano Video Video
What could make the iPod video even better than it already is? Shrink the size of the screen to just over an inch. Sure, smaller is better, but watching a video on an already-tiny iPod nano? Seems a bit pointless. This feat was done with the help of Linux-powered Podzilla. Remember, kids, with Linux, anything is possible.

iPod nano video demonstration [Google Video]
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-6974467646937874348


Nethrone Workstation: Torture Device?
This is not a torture device. You have to trust us on this one as much as you are tempted not to. The Nethrone is a crazy-looking ergonomic device that looks like a dentist's chair designed for comfortable computing. Leaning back in the comfy leather seat and looking up at the screen keeps you from straining your neck as much as you normally would using a computer. Designer Eran Baruhe wants you to have complete comfort and control over your experience in the Nethrone, so nearly every part of the thing is adjustable to make you relaxed and comfortable. Comfort doesn't come cheap, though, so be prepared to shell out $2500 for the Nethrone when it comes out in January, 2006.
http://www.uncrate.com/men/gear/office/nethrone-002552.php

ROKR E1 Ranked Among The Worst Products Of 2005

ROKR E1 Ranked Among The Worst Products Of 2005
ROKR E1: The Oakley Thump of the mobile phone set; at least it's a decent phone. The hype around "The First iTunes Phone" created unfulfillable expectations. It's not as polished as an iPod, and its oddly limited music storage makes a mediocre player even worse. Glacially slow music-transfer speeds put the final nail in this coffin. Sony Ericsson sells a much better MP3-phone combo, but I suggest a shuffle and a RAZR phone: Cheaper-and better, too.
http://news.mobile9.com/2005/12/rokr-e1-ranked-among-the-worst-products-of-2005
http://www.pcmag.com/article2/0,1759,1891472,00.asp

Feel like hitting the wall with my head now since I just got a Motorola E398. Motorola ROKKR E1 is actually E398 + iTunes. Wonder whether this means my E398 is also a worst product of 2004

Anyway, you can read the Bottom 10: Worst Software Disasters from the link below.
http://www.pcmag.com/article2/0,1759,1636333,00.asp

Want to know how our life is formed? Go to this website; now this is awesome!
http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/nova/miracle/program.html

King Kong Island Home Is Pure Fantasy

King Kong Island Home Is Pure Fantasy, Ecology Experts Say

Stefan Lovgren
for National Geographic News

December 14, 2005
The massive star of the new movie King Kong, which opens today, effectively apes real gorillas. But the bizarre assortment of wildlife on the creature's island home seems to be from out of this world.

As seen in the remake of the 1933 film classic, Skull Island is supposed to lie somewhere in the Indian Ocean.

In the island's jungles roam a wide array of dinosaurs, including Tyrannosaurus rex; aggressive, 3-foot (90-centimeter) cockroaches; bloodthirsty car-size crabs; and, of course, Kong, a 25-foot-tall (8-meter-tall) silverback gorilla who lives alone in his mountain hideaway.

It's a world that violates most of modern science's evolutionary rules.

"The notion that dinosaurs could survive on a tiny mid-oceanic island is preposterous," said John Terborgh, a professor of environmental science at Duke University in Raleigh, North Carolina.

"Islands, even moderately large ones, are notoriously devoid of large predators," he said. "The two largest predators on Cuba are a lizard and the red-tailed hawk. The whole notion of apex predators on islands is fantasy."

Island Laboratory

The giant gorilla presumably evolved in isolation on Skull Island, though this is never explained in the movie.

Islands, as Charles Darwin said, appear to be nature's laboratory, where experiments are carried out with species that travel from the mainland.

"The first experiment is titled, Can you survive on this place that is different in every way from the mainland or other island from whence you came?" marine science expert Dennis Kelly said. "Most species probably do not survive this experiment."

But those that do survive often change over time to fill an ecological niche that exists on those islands.

"If a species is small—usually very small—it can actually increase in size [via a phenomenon] called gigantism," said Kelly, a professor at Orange Coast College in Costa Mesa, California California's Santa Cruz Island scrub jay, for example, is up to a third larger than mainland jays.

"[But they can't grow] by too much … due to the often limited resources and space on any island," Kelly said.


Other species, such as the tiny island fox of California's Santa Rosa Island, may shrink—a trend known as dwarfism.

In the process of growing larger or smaller, a few species may change their basic structures—birds may become flightless, for example. But no species would grow as huge as director Peter Jackson's great ape.

"Kong is obviously not a realistic representation of an island species," said Stanley Temple, a wildlife ecology professor at the University of Wisconsin-Madison. "Primates don't often get to remote islands.

"I can think of no evolutionary advantage for an island primate to become larger than its ancestor," he added. In fact, the opposite would be more likely.

"Think about the small Homo species recently discovered," Temple said, referring to the "hobbit" species of early human (Homo floresiensis) recently found on Flores Island in Indonesia.

"Larger animals have smaller populations than smaller animals, so a population of giants on an island would be small in numbers and, hence, more vulnerable to extinction than a smaller-sized animal."

Many species are particularly vulnerable on islands because the animals have evolved in the absence of competitors, predators, and parasites and have thus lost their defenses.

Chest Beating

Granted, King Kong is not meant to be scientifically dissected. The filmmakers deliberately changed some of their animals' anatomies.

The T. rex, for example, has claws with three fingers instead of the scientifically correct two—an homage to the original movie, in which the dinosaur had an extra finger.

But the filmmakers did set out to portray King Kong himself as realistically as possible.

"It's based on a silverback gorilla, absolutely," Richard Taylor, the head creatures designer for the movie, said in a telephone interview from New Zealand, where his Weta workshop is based.

In the 1933 movie, Kong walks around on two feet, beating his chest with clenched fists. The modern Kong—like his real-life counterparts—walks on his knuckles and feet and beats his chest with cupped hands.

The new Kong, however, is shown standing straight up on his rear legs and beating his chest, something that a real gorilla can't do to the same extent.

Andy Serkis, who played Gollum in the Lord of the Rings movies, was outfitted with motion sensors to provide the movement and voice for Kong. He also, with the help of 132 sensors, controlled the ape's facial expressions.

To learn how mountain gorillas walk, communicate, and interact, Serkis studied gorillas in one of their natural habitats in Rwanda.

Like Kong, real-life male silverback gorillas are fiercely protective of their females and young. If confronted by a hunter, silverbacks may stay behind and position themselves between the hunter and the fleeing gorilla family.

Frans de Waal is a primatologist at Yerkes National Primate Research Center in Atlanta, Georgia. He says Kong appears "more humanlike than gorillalike," based on the movie previews he has seen.

"The few scenes I have seen have too much direct eye contact by King Kong," de Waal said. "Gorillas almost never stare straight into the eyes of anybody."

Then there is the distinctive gorilla odor.

"The film audience misses out on this," de Waal said. "[It] must be powerful coming from an oversized gorilla. I'm curious if the girl [played by Naomi Watts] will faint."

New Software In The Market Called Wife 1.0

Dear Tech Support:

Last year, I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0.

I soon noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of space and valuable resources. In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other programs and now monitors all other system activities. Applications such as Poker Night 10.3 , Football 5.0 , Hunting and Fishing 7.5 , and Racing 3.6 no longer run, crashing the system whenever selected.

I can't seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run my favorite applications. I'm thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0 , but the uninstall doesn't work on Wife 1.0 . Please help!

Thanks,
A Troubled User.


______________________________________________________


REPLY:
Dear Troubled User:

This is a very common problem that men complain about.

Many people upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 thinking that it is just a Utilities and Entertainment program. Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and is designed by its Creator to run EVERYTHING!!!

It is also impossible to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to Girlfriend 7.0. It is impossible to uninstall, or purge the program files from the system once installed. You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed to not allow this. Look in your Wife 1.0 manual under Warnings -
- Alimony
- Child Support.

I recommend that you keep Wife 1.0 and work on improving the situation. I suggest installing the background application "Yes Dear" to alleviate software augmentation. The best course of action is to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE because ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the system will return to normal anyway. Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high maintenance. Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean and Sweep 3.0, Cook It 1.5 and Do Bills 4.2.

However, be very careful how you use these programs. Improper use will cause the system to launch the program Nag Nag 9.5. Once this happens, the only way to improve the performance of Wife 1.0 is to purchase additional software. I recommend Flowers 2.1 and Diamonds 5.0

WARNING!!! DO NOT under any circumstances, install Secretary With Short Skirt 3.3 . This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and will cause irreversible damage to the operating system.

Best of luck!!
Tech Support

Definition and comparison of DVD video formats

Definition and comparison of DVD video formats
DVD stands for Digital Versatile/Video Disc
DVDR stands for DVD Recordable
DVDRW for DVD ReWriteable.

There are three competing DVD Recording standards, DVD-R/W and DVD+R/W have pretty similiar features and are compatible with many standalone DVD Players and most DVD-ROMs while DVD-RAM has less DVD Player and DVD-ROM compatibility but better recording features.

1)DVD-R and DVD-RW
DVD-R/W was the first DVD recording format released that was compatible with standalone DVD Players.
DVD-R is a non-rewriteable format and it is compatible with about 93% of all DVD Players and most DVD-ROMs.
DVD-RW is a rewriteable format and it is compatible with about 79% of all DVD Players and most DVD-ROMs.
DVD-R/W supports single side 4.37 computer GB* DVDs(called DVD-5) and double sided 8.75 computer GB* DVDs(called DVD-10).
These formats are supported by DVDForum.

2) DVD+R and DVD+RW
DVD+R/W has some "better" features than DVD-R/W such as lossless linking and both CAV and CLV writing.
DVD+R is a non-rewritable format and it is compatible with about 88% of all DVD Players and most DVD-ROMs.
DVD+RW is a rewritable format and is compatible with about 79% of all DVD Players and most DVD-ROMs.
DVD+R/W supports single side 4.37 computer GB* DVDs(called DVD-5) and double side 8.75 computer GB* DVDs(called DVD-10).
These formats are supported by the DVD+RW Alliance.
DVD+R DL or called DVD+R9 is a Dual Layer writeable DVD+R. The dual layered discs can hold 7.95 computer GB* (called DVD-9) and dual layered double sides 15.9* computer GB (called dvd-18).

3) DVD-RAM
DVD-RAM has the best recording features but it is not compatible with most DVD-ROM drives and DVD-Video players. Think more of it as a removable hard disk. DVD-RAM is usually used in some DVD Recorders.
This format is supported by DVDForum.


DVD Sizes, What is DVD-5, DVD-10, DVD-9 and DVD-18?
How much does a DVDR/W fit? Is it 4.7GB or 4.38GB? 8.54 GB or 7.95 GB?
The DVD sizes can be a bit confusing. There are basicly 4 different dvd sizes,
DVD-5, holds around 4 700 000 000 bytes and that is 4.37GB.
DVD+R/W and DVD-R/W supports this format. Also called Single Sided Single Layered.
DVD-10, holds around 9 400 000 000 bytes and that is 8.75GB. DVD+R/W and DVD-R/W supports this format. Also called Double Sided Single Layered.
DVD-9, holds around 8 540 000 000 bytes and that is 7.95GB. DVD+R supports this format. Also called Single Sided Dual Layered.
DVD-18, holds around 17 080 000 000 bytes and that is 15.9GB. DVD+R supports this format. Also called Double Sided Dual Layered.

Other non-standard special DVD formats:
DVD-VCD - is basicly a VCD authored on a DVDR/W. DVD supports the VCD resolution but the audio has to be resampled to 48 khz. If the audio is resampled to 48 khz it is standard DVD-Video.
DVD-SVCD - is basicly a SVCD authored on a DVDR/W. DVD do not supports the SVCD resolution but it may anyway work and the audio has to be resampled to 48 khz like the DVD-VCD.
DVD-MP3 - is MP3s burned on a DVDR/W but very few MP3 capable standalone DVD Players supports it because most Players verify DVDR/W as DVD-Video only.
DVD-ISO - is MPEG,MPG,VOB files burned on a DVDR/W without any DVD Authoring (making the vob,ifo files) but very few standalone DVD Players supports it because most Players verify DVDR/W as DVD-Video only.



Technical Info for DVD-Video

PAL
Video:
Up to 9.8 Mbit/sec MPEG2 or up to 1.856 MBit/sec MPEG1 video
720 x 576 pixels MPEG2 (Called Full-D1)
704 x 576 pixels MPEG2
352 x 576 pixels MPEG2 (Called Half-D1, same as the CVD Standard)
352 x 288 pixels MPEG2
352 x 288 pixels MPEG1 (Same as the VCD Standard)
25 fps (frames/second)
16:9 Anamorphic (only supported by 720x576)
Audio:
48000 Hz
32 - 1536 kbit/sec
Up to 8 audio tracks containing Dolby Digital, DTS, PCM(uncompressed audio), MPEG-1 Layer2. One audio track must have MPEG-1, DD or PCM Audio.

Extras:
Menus, still pictures, subtitles and more.


NTSC (NTSC Film)
Video:
Up to 9.8 Mbit/sec MPEG2 or up to 1.856 MBit/sec MPEG1 video
720 x 480 pixels MPEG2 (Called Full-D1)
704 x 480 pixels MPEG2
352 x 480 pixels MPEG2 (Called Half-D1, same as the CVD Standard)
352 x 240 pixels MPEG2
352 x 240 pixels MPEG1 (Same as the VCD Standard)
29,97 fps (frames/second)
23,976 fps with 3:2 pulldown = 29,97 playback fps (NTSC Film, this is only supported by MPEG2 video)
16:9 Anamorphic (only supported by 720x480)

Audio:
48000 Hz
32 - 1536 kbit/sec
Up to 8 audio tracks containing DD (Dolby Digital/AC3), DTS, PCM(uncompressed audio), MPEG-1 Layer2. One audio track must have DD or PCM Audio.

Extras:
Menus, still pictures, subtitles and more.


DVD File/Folder Structure

Explanation:
. BUP = Backup files of the IFO files.
. IFO = The IFO files includes information such as chapters, subtitle tracks and audio tracks.
. VOB = The VOB files contains the actual video,audio,subtitles and menus.

http://www.gromkov.com/faq/faq2004-0070.html

Flash + Word of the day

Some nice flash game website that will help you to kill some time.
http://www.ferryhalim.com/orisinal/
http://www.xgenstudios.com/
http://www.funnygames.nl/host/games/lemmings/

Word of the day:
sub rosa \suhb-ROH-zuh\, adverb:
Secretly; privately; confidentially.

digerati \dij-uh-RAH-tee\, plural noun:
Persons knowledgeable about computers and technology.

Modern Rock Hits of the 90's

Modern Rock Hits of the 90's
There are so many rock songs in the 90's, it is kind of hard to name them all. What I can do is try to collect them one by one. Below is what I just collected, it is a pleasure to listen back to these songs that once accompany me when I was younger.

Kindly ignore the numbering, it is not a chart.

1. Dishwalla - Pet Your Friends - Counting Blue Cars (1995)
2. Soundgarden - Down on the Upside - Pretty Noose (1996)
3. Blur - Blur - Song 2 (1997)
4. Live - Throwing Copper - I Alone (1994)
5. Third Eye Blind - Third Eye Blind - Semi Charmed Life (1997)
6. Primitive Radio Gods - Rocket - Standing Outside A Broken Phone Booth With Money In My Hand (1996)
7. Live - Throwing Copper - Lightning Crashes (1994)
8. Nine Inch Nails - The Downward Spiral - A Warm Place (1994)
9. Radiohead - The Bends - High And Dry (1995)
10. Smashing Pumpkins - Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness - Tonight, Tonight (1995)
11. Spin Doctors - Pocket Full Of Kryptonite - Two Princes (1992)
12. Aerosmith - Get a Grip - Cryin' (1993)
13. Prodigy - The Fat Of The Land - Firestarter (1997)
14. Green Day - Dookie - Basket Case (1994)
15. Bush - Sixteen Stone - Glycerine (1994)
16. R.E.M - Automatic For The People - Everybody Hurts (1993)
17. Stone Temple Pilots - Purple - Interstate Love Song (1994)
18. The Presidents of the United States of America - The Presidents of the United States of America - Lump (1995)
19. Rage Against the Machine - Evil Empire - Bulls on Parade (1996)
20. Gin Blossoms - New Miserable Experience - Hey Jealousy (1992)
21. Collective Soul - Hints Allegations and Things.. - Shine (1994)
22. Lenny Kravitz - 5 - Fly Away (1999)
23. Nine Inch Nails - The Downward Spiral - Closer (1994)
24. Pearl Jam - Ten - Even Flow (1991)
25. Metallica - Metallica - Enter Sandman (1991)
26. Rage Against the Machine - Battle of Los Angeles - Guerilla Radio (1999)

A visionary, vision is scary

A visionary, vision is scary, could start a revolution.
How to start a scary vision?
Where is Freddy Kruger? Come on, give me some scary vision.
Don't wear the old latex mask; don't you know we got plastic surgery?
Come, go lead a normal life.
http://www.nightmareonelmstreet.com/

I'm interesting, the best thing since wrestling
Infesting in your kids ears and nesting
Testing "Attention Please"
Nothing is fair, come on, grabs a gun, and tries to frag me down in Doom
I am not the greatest, not the oldest, at least I m useless
http://www.doom3.com/

Football Manager 2006

Football Manager 2006 is out and there was I, desperate to prove my football management skill again. So I found myself can't live without it, kind of social retarded person. If anyone were to ask me out, guess you would know my answer, sorry guys.


An interesting comment from TrustedReviews - The UK's Premier Source for IT Reviews & News
http://www.trustedreviews.com/article.aspx?head=49&page=4922

As expected, Football Manager 2006 takes the series to the next level. It expands every area, pushes every boundary and never before has such an enviable career felt so real. Sports Interactive probably never dreamed it would come so far from the very first Championship Manager title all those years ago. It has picked up millions of fans since then, but it has also lost the casual gamer along the way.

Photograph 2005

Finally, I completed my first flickr photo album, feel free to browse around. The photo album contains most of the photo that got me in Motorola Penang.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/fooheantee/sets/1500304/

Nickelback - Photograph
Look at this photograph
Everytime I do it makes me laugh
How did our eyes get so red
And what the hell's on Joey's head

And this is where I grew up
I think the present owner fixed it up
I never knew we'd ever went without
The second floor is hard for sneaking out

And this is where I went to school
Most of the time I had better things to do
Criminal records said I've broken twice
I must have done it half a dozen times

I wonder if its too late
Should I go back and try to graduate
Life's better now than it was back then
If I was them I woulndnt let me in

Oh oh oh
Oh god I

Every memory of looking out the back door
I have the photo album spread out on the bedroom floor
Its hard to say it, time to say it
Goodbye, goodbye

Every memory of walking out the front door
I found the photo of the friend that I was looking for
Its hard to say it, time to say it
Goodbye, goodbye

Goodbye

Remember that old arcade
Blew every dollar that we ever made
The cops hated us hangin out
They say somebody went and burned it down

We used to listen to the radio
And sing along with every song we know
We said someday wed find out how if feels
To sing to more than just the steering wheel

Kim's the first girl I kissed
I was so nervous that I nearly missed
She's had a couple of kids since then
I haven't seen her since god knows when

Oh oh oh
Oh god I

Every memory of looking out the back door
I have the photo that was printed on my bedroom door
Its hard to say it, time to say it
Goodbye, goodbye

Every memory of walking out the front door
I found the photo of the friend that I was looking for
Its hard to say it, time to say it
Goodbye, goodbye

I miss that town
I miss the faces
I can't erase it
I can't replace it
I miss it now
I cannot believe it
So hard to stay
So hard to leave it

If I could I relive those days
I know the one that would never change

Every memory of looking out the back door
I have the photo that was printed on my bedroom door
Its hard to say it, time to say it
Goodbye, goodbye

Every memory of walking out the front door
I found the photo of the friend that I was looking for
Its hard to say it, time to say it
Goodbye, goodbye

Look at this photograph
Everytime I do it makes me laugh
Everytime I do it makes me

Appreciative 2005

Appreciative
# Feeling or expressive of gratitude; "was appreciative of his efforts"; "an appreciative word"
# having or showing appreciation or a favorable critical judgment or opinion; "appreciative of a beautiful landscape"; "an appreciative laugh from the audience"
wordnet.princeton.edu/perl/webwn

Once there was a smooth, no speed bump road. The drive was smooth, but the residence there was not happy with traffic amount that passes in front of their house everyday. Even in the middle of the night where those new and nice car but fitted with noisy making accessories cruising around emitting nothing but pure noise. Surely this is not so good to the property value there. What seems to be a good idea back fired. Speed bump is good to slow a vehicle down, but too many speed bumps will cause traffic congestion.

Sigh, kind of lame to drive through 3 bump everyday. One day, I decided to be adventurous and try another short cut. To my dismay, I really regret it. Less traffic is good, but 5 speed bumps are too extreme for me.

Guess I must be more appreciative. Don't complain too much as I was given considerable good luck. 3 speed bumps surely beat 5 speed bumps.

paultan.org

paultan.org is a blog on the Malaysian automotive industry. Includes reviews, previews, tech articles and automobile howtos.

Below is what I think is quite interesting for you there to read about.

China Pirates
If you think Malaysia's state of piracy is bad, you ain't seen nothing yet. China is where Uncle Ho got his MBA in Piracy. They can pirate anything and nothing's stopped them for doing it. Proton ripping off Alfa's grill for the Perdana V6 and Alfa's sport rims design for the Proton Gen2 is nothing compared to what Chinese car manufacturers are capable of.
http://paultan.org/archives/2004/12/05/china-pirates/

Japanese Automakers Alliances
Ever wondered who owns who, and who supplies what to whom in the automotive industry? Here are charts of some sorts showing the relationships among Japanese automakers and also relationships between Japanese and American/European/Chinese automakers.
http://paultan.org/archives/2005/12/08/japanese-automakers-alliances/

iPod stuff

The Queen's got an iPod
A slightly less important story appeared in the The Sun today. Apparently, the Queen has gone and got herself an iPod. Obviously, she didn't pop down to Dixons on ladies' night, but instead sent some flunkey along to purchase the player for her. By all accounts it's the silver iPod mini. Presumably it had to be the silver since the more regal gold one's not available anymore. According to Tech Digest, the Queen already has a mobile, which she uses to text her grandchildren. It doesn't matter how many times this story is reported, there's no way I'm going to believe for a second that the queen sends texts and listens to MP3s. 1 smply cnt blieve its tru.



iPod Chair Man speakers
At last - an iPod accessory idea that has legs and indeed hands. Scoring high for cuteness, as you would expect for an accessory aimed at the Japanese market, the Chair Man portable speakers are available this month in three different colours - black, blue and pink.

There are two 50mm diameter speakers built-in to the feet while the arms/legs can be moved about to secure your iPod. To use the speakers, just plug your iPod into the stereo-mini jack input on the side. Power is from a single by a single AAA battery or the mains.


iGuy - Daft iPod Case
Let's face it, your iPod is pretty sure of itself: it knows it's cooler than you, and everyone else around it for that matter. So teach it a lesson by dressing it in this get up, turning your oh-so-trendy white monument to minimalism into a goofy iGuy with arms, legs and an added key holding menial task facility. That'll learn it. There's currently a model for the standard sized iPods, but a mini is apparently on its way later in the month.



Party on with iPod pants
Courtesy of Shiny Shiny, news reaches us of the latest in hi-tech underwear for men - the iPod pants. Whether there's a demand for these groovin' garments isn't really made clear.

You don't need to plug them in or stuff them with batteries. These pants simply come complete with a small pocket to hold your iPod or MP3 player of choice - ideal for the obsessive gadgeteer who can never be parted from his player!

If you think musical pants are the future, you can find out how to pick a pair up at Shiny Shiny.
http://www.shinyshiny.tv/2005/12/ipod_boxer_shor.html

I want iPod Nano

iPod Book Cover
Now this is smart. They've taken some old-school, hardcover pulp novels and turned them into iPod cases. Because really, iPod theft may be a real problem these days, but you don't hear many reports of folks having their copies of Lovely You, Detective Fiction or Scavengers is Space lifted from their bags.



iPod Nano Wallet
Since folks keep talking about how the Nano is about the size of a credit card, I can see the thought process that might encourage you to carry it like one. At least that seems to be the idea behind Marware's leather CEO Billfold Wallet, which has a special pocket for your Nano (including headphone jack, charger access and plastic screen.)

Convenient? Sure. Well - only if you want to carry it in your jacket since it's not meant for "use in pants pocket" (and presumably would be awkward in a purse as well). Oh - and if you don't mind having to flash your wallet around every time you want to skip songs. Doesn't the iPod family have enough of a reputation as being targeted for theft without adding the temptation of a full billfold to it?


mTune
I've been trying to puzzle this one out. On the one hand I understand the wireless listening appeal of the mTune headset - just pop your Nano into the special slot and you can dance like a maniac to your playlist without getting caught up in any wires.



Podstar's Devlish Nano Cases
Is your Nano naughty? (Or does it want to be?) Then the silicon Diabolo case from Podstar might be the Nano cover for you.

The Podstar Diabolo isn't on the market just yet - but when it is, it will be available in two colors, four designs, and will include a screen protector. And, perhaps more importantly, the bad-girl image you'll be giving your Nano should help counterbalance any inferiority issues it may have due to being the smallest kid on the iPod block

SiteSearch Google

WWW http://aba9785.blogspot.com/

Seniority

Seniority
Seniority is the concept of a person or group being in charge or in command of another person or group. This control is often granted to the senior person(s) due to experience or length of service in a given position, but it is not uncommon for a senior person(s) to have less experience or length of service than their subordinates.

More generally, "seniority" can be a description of an individual's experience or length of service, and can thus be used to differentiate between individuals of otherwise equivalent status without placing them in a hierarchy of direct authority.

Subordinates are generally expected to follow the actions, orders, or requests of those senior to them with little or no question.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Seniority

Well, I have nothing against seniority rules and I do agree with the definition above, partly. There are good and bad about seniority rules.

The good.
Generally senior has more experience or work longer than their counterpart, thus placing them higher in hierarchy than those new hires is correct. The new hires will respect their senior and seek their assistance when required; the senior can guide the new hires, thus saving them a lot of time and avoid banging dead-end.

The bad.
Sometime the freshly join person have more experience than the person who has longer service length. It is kind of awkward to become subordinate under someone who is less or equally competent than you.

The ugly.
It discourages changes to the organization. As a junior, he or she is unable to contribute or provide changes to the work environment even though he or she has really good idea. After that, he or she have to work the way up the rank the old method, stay and work longer there.

Machi lyric 2

制作人阿弟仔用了大量的周星驰电影中的经典配乐和电影对白，加上 Machi 超重嘻哈节拍的诠释与麻吉弟弟的快嘴功，再请来了热爱周星星的制作人“阿弟仔”一同参与并跨刀演唱，整首歌曲充满独特的趣味性，是一首相当惊人的歌曲！除了听到由周星驰”幕后发言人”石斑鱼配上的经典的口白：“小强！你怎么了小强！你不能死啊…”听了让人发噱！一连串嘻哈快节奏搭配周星驰电影中经典的配乐加以混音，整首歌气势十足、噱头也十足！没想到周星驰也可以如此嘻哈，难怪麻吉们要高喊”我爱周星星”！

歌曲：我爱周星星
歌手：黄立成/machi 专辑：超人

小强小强你怎么了小强
小强你不能死啊!
『麻吉弟弟』:
禀夫人小人本住在苏州的城边
家中有屋又有田生活乐无边
谁知那唐伯虎他蛮横不留情
勾结官府目无天占我大屋夺我田
我爷爷跟他来翻脸惨被他一棍来打扁
我奶奶骂他欺善民反被他抓进唐府强奸一百遍一百遍
他还将我两父子逐出了家园流落到江边
我为求养老爹只有独自行乞在庙前
谁知那唐伯虎他实在太阴险
知道此情形竟派人来暗算
将我父子狂殴在市前
小人身壮健残命得留存
可怜老父他魂归天此恨更难填
为求葬老爹唯有卖身为奴自做贱
一面勤赚钱一面读书篇
发誓把功名显手刃仇人意志坚
从此唐寅诗集伴身边我铭记此仇不共戴天

小强小强你怎么了小强
小强你不能死啊!

『阿弟仔』:
一乡二里共三夫子
不识四书五经六义
竟敢交七八九子十分大胆
『麻吉弟弟』:
十室九贫筹得八两七钱六分五毫四厘
尚且三心二一一等下流
『阿弟仔』:
图画里龙不吟虎不啸
小小书僮可笑可笑
『麻吉弟弟』:
棋盘里车无轮马无鞭
叫声将军提防提防
『阿弟仔』:
莺莺蒸蒸翠翠红红处处融融恰恰
『麻吉弟弟』:
雨雨风风花花叶叶年年暮暮朝朝
『小崔』:
十口心思思君思国思社稷
八目共赏赏花赏月赏秋香
『阿弟仔』:
我上等威风显现一身虎胆
『麻吉弟弟』:
你下流贱格露出半个龟头
『阿弟仔』:
你家坟头来种树
『麻吉弟弟』:
你家澡盆杂配鱼
『阿弟仔』:
你鱼肥果熟入我肚
『麻吉弟弟』:
你老娘来亲下厨
『阿弟仔』:
年轻人你跟我抢饭碗你那个道上的
『麻吉弟弟』:还没请教『阿弟仔』:教上教
『麻吉弟弟』:先请而后教『阿弟仔』:教请而先教
『麻吉弟弟』:先请而先教『阿弟仔』:先请而先教
『麻吉弟弟』:后请而后教『麻吉弟弟&阿弟仔』:再说我就要教了
小强小强你怎么了小强
小强你不能死啊!

Machi lyric 1

整首歌曲有六个不同的声音，有黄立成、小崔、当屁和受罪个人独特的 Rap、有 Mel 的歌声和最擅长的随性 Fill，以不同的表现方式一段段描写出 Machi 打拼的过程。中版的节奏加上振奋人心的歌词，男声与女声的对应，有态度又具音乐性，是值得推荐的歌曲。

歌曲：石头变黄金
歌手：machi 专辑：超人

想想我有什么成就
爸妈到六十还不敢退休
曾经志同道合的朋友
问我还在撑要撑多久
唱片业愈走愈退后
大家都怀疑这头路吃饭够不够
有人因为穿着看不起我
看不到我未来她离开我
我没有闯祸但是我却没有得到糖果
送出demo像沉进水里没回音
他们说这不能卖钱没有人听
你的年纪是那些新人两倍
花公司的钱栽培根本是白浪费
emi说滚开环球说你头壳坏
被sony当屁华纳说你不会卖
他们看我又来就把铁门拉下来
被打击看扁我也不们停下来
别人当玩票性质
我做音乐不只做一辈子
我要的是machi 4 life
不是一张叫合约的纸
身上的刺青用来写我历史
写着命运要靠自已控制
未来用我的方式
我唱的是事实不是歌词
麦克风给我就别想叫我停止
大哥不用再动一根手指
我帮他赚的绝对够他再开好几家公司
只活一次不能白活拿命换一个结果
机会一次不能放过拿命拼一个王国
我知道你是谁有什么梦要追
往自己的天空飞
我知道什么是对有什么梦要追
没有时间能浪费
要我停下来不要绕舌
就像一个人妄想能挡住黄河
为了我的梦不怕痛
练到喉咙流血脚底流脓
如果有种一定不会穷
拼到好几家公司觉得还不够成功
永远要做抓不住的龙
以前算是一个笨蛋因为高中没念完
爸爸生了这个没用的儿子
麻将桌上让他很没面子
别人的孩子都是名校我这么不孝
害他一直放炮现在爸爸一直自摸
另外三家要他儿子的签名照
以前吃便当现在吃鲍鱼翅汤
以前听校长念
现在我在八国国庆总统面前表演
我相信一条命就要一直拼
不会停的人有一天会赢
没有事情是天注定拼了你的命
石头也会变黄金

Our Lawyer Made Us Change The Name Of This Song So We Wouldn't Get Sued

FALL OUT BOY - "Our Lawyer Made Us Change The Name Of This Song So We Wouldn't Get Sued"

Brothers and sisters put this record down
Take my advice ('cause we are bad news)
We will leave you high and dry
It's not worth the hearing you'll lose

It's just past 8 and I'm feeling young and reckless
The ribbon on my wrist says, "Do not open before Christmas."

We're only liars, but we're the best (we're the best)
We're only good for the latest trend
We're only good cause you can have almost famous friends
Besides, we've got such good fashion sense

Brothers and sisters, yeah, put these words down
Into your notebook (spit lines like these)
We're friends when you're on your knees
Make them dance like we were shooting their feet

It's just past 8 and I'm feeling young and reckless
The ribbon on my wrist says, "Do not open before Christmas."

We're only liars, but we're the best (we're the best)
We're only good for the latest trend
We're only good cause you can have almost famous friends
Besides, we've got such good fashion sense

We're only liars, but we're the best
We're only good for the latest trend

We're only liars, but we're the best
We're only good for the latest trend
We're only good cause you can have almost famous friends
Besides, we've got such good fashion sense

PIKOM PC Fair 2005

PIKOM PC Fair
Sounds like another normal place for you to get computer hardware peripheral, software and etc. PC Fair, a place where you can get many computer peripheral under one roof, who would of something else?

Well, things went a bit different albeit I went there to get some blank media, new ink jet printer, and other miscellaneous stuff. So go there with a mind on what I want to get, while I was asking around for a good bargain. I came face to face with one of my TARC PG friend, so I do what other people usually do, talk awhile with him then continue shopping.

PC Fair was quite packed on the last day with many people hoping to get the best out of their hard earned money. So was me, going from shop to shop to get a good deal. Then I bump into another friend from college, I get acquainted with him for a while. It is kind of weird place to bump into friend in this place.

After getting what I plan, I take my leave and got the car park, put all my things and ready to head home. Since it is kind of congested, I have to drive slowly. From behind, I recognize just another high school friend of mine. Driving at speed of less than 10 KM/H, I sneak up on him. When I was really close and he didn't suspect anything, I shout his name. He was kind of shock, but reacted fairly well. We just talk for few seconds and I am off cause there are cars behind me and I don't want to cause any congestion.

So much for computer peripheral under one roof, it seems more to be a place to go and bump into long lost friend. Can't say I just go there to get computer hardware, I must say I go there for 2 purpose, to seek good bargain and to seek long lost friends.

Can't wait for the next PC Fair.

My contract status

I started working in Motorola from April 10 2005 and my current contract is due on January 10 2006. This means that in 1 month's time, my contract will end, my question here is: am I going to be offered new contract and continue to work here? Or am I going to be converted to permanent? Or Jan 10 2006 will be my last day working here?

Whatever the outcome will be, I will respect the managerial decision and I won't make a fuss out of it. It has been nice to contribute here; I have learned many things, gain some experiences and earn some acknowledgement from peers. It feels good to wear the Motorola uniform to work everyday, I am proud to be part of the Motorola Family.

If my work performance is below par of what is expected from Motorola employee, I would understand if I didn't get anymore opportunity to be here. Kindly inform me earlier so that I can plan for my future else where. Please don't let me know last minute and make me disorganized.

Should I didn't get to work here after my contract expires, rest assure that I will still contribute 100% effort when I still under contract, I won't be lazy, won't be destructive nor unproductive.

Your reply to me will be kept confidential and I will not reveal it to other people.
Thank you.

My daily wish will never become true

My daily wish will never become true

Sender:
My daily wish is to see you smile, know you are happy & feel you are loved. I know that life is not easy. So I am here to remind you life is beautiful when somebody cares.

Receiver reply:
Life is not beautiful. I am not loved. No one cares for me. Your wish will never come true. I don't smile everyday. My life is meaningless.

Sender:
I will bang my head on the wall.

My life as a

Dedicated to Aw Yeang Tze Ling
My life as a TV set
==============
Before you came into my life:
My life is black and white,
My life is mono,
My life is dull.


After you came into my life:
My life is full of color,
My life is in stereo sound (where applicable),
My life is exciting.




My life as a gem stone
=================
Before you came into my life:
I just an ordinary stone,
Buried deep in the ground down under,
I have so many flaws.


After you came into my life:
I am carved into a sparkling gem,
Put on display in an elegant jewelry store,
Shining bright and flawless.

Relationship is so complicated

Relationship is so complicated
- a relation between people; (`relationship' is often used where `relation' would serve, as in `the relationship between inflation and unemployment', but the preferred usage of `relationship' is for human relations or states of relatedness); "the relationship between mothers and their children"
- a state of connectedness between people (especially an emotional connection); "he didn't want his wife to know of the relationship"
- a state involving mutual dealings between people or parties or countries
- kinship: (anthropology) relatedness or connection by blood or marriage or adoption
wordnet.princeton.edu/perl/webwn

Ever wonder why so many people are still single in their late 30's or 40's. Is it they busy with work till no time for dating? Is it they can't find their Mr. Right or Miss right? Is it they don't trust the relationship thing?

Sometimes I also don't trust the relationship thing, because it is complicated, ever changing. Simply put dynamic and unpredictable.

Is meeting each other daily a good idea? I can't comment on it. Even I also facing problem. Most of the time, the failure of a relationship is because of communication problem. Without proper communication, most people will be single till they rest in peace. With proper communication, even a young boy can marry to a woman who is 3 times his age. (If they can play deaf to the comments from the public)

If I were asked to make a comparison between life long partner and part time partner. I would say that being temporary does release you from all the responsibilities and commitment, something that most people are scared of. You can have more choices as people come and go out of your life. This kind of explains why many people have multiple partner or changing partner so fast.

Life long means for life, unless you plan for a divorce in the middle. To achieve life long, you need commitment, responsibilities, initiative and a lot of patient. Now let's see what the reward is, you will have kids, a lot of time to relax when is old. Get to play with your grand son, sense of achievement. Now you have your own family, something that you can be proud of.



Limp Bizkit - Behind Blue Eyes

But my dreams they aren't as empty
As my conscience seems to be
I have hours, only lonely
My love is vengeance
That's never free

No one knows what its like
To feel these feelings
Like I do and I blame you!
No one bites back as hard
On their anger
None of my pain and woe
Can show through

No one knows what its like
To be mistreated, to be defeated

No one knows how to say
That they're sorry

You live you learn

You live you learn
You ask you learn, you agonize you learn. You advice you learn.
You bleed you learn. You burned you learn. You brag you learn.
You cry you learn. You choke you learn. You choose you learn
You doped you learn. You duped you learn. You dissatisfied you learn.
You eliminated you learn. You electrocuted you learn.
You flame you learn. You faint you learn. You fell you learn.
You grieve you learn. You give you learn. You guess you learn.
You hate you learn. You hesitate you learn. You hemorrhage you learn.
You investigate you learn. You interrogate you learn. You invent you learn.
You joke you learn. You jobless you learn.
You kill you learn. You keen you learn.
You live you learn. You loose you learn. You laugh you learn. You love you learn
You mobbed you learn. You milked you learn. You mix you learn.
You nabbed you learn. You naked you learn. You nuke you learn
You oppose you learn. You object you learn. You organize you learn.
You pray you learn. You perverted you learn. You pissed you learn.
You question you learn. You queue you learn.
You retarded you learn. You reminded you learn.
You scream you learn. You spy you learn. You suffer you learn.
You talk you learn. You throw you learn.
You underestimate you learn. You undermine you learn.
You violate you learn. You vomit you learn.
You whacked you learn. You wet you learn.
You Xerox you learn. You x-rayed you learn.
You yell you learn. You yield you learn.
You zigzag you learn. You zippered you learn.

Trust

It is not that I don't want to join you all; it is not that I am not sociable; it is not that I dislike you all.

I trust you all, I will support you all when you need support, and I will do my best and help when you all need me. I am a player in a team.

The problem is you all don't trust me. Someone told you all some story about me and you all buy it, thus making me the most not welcome member in the team.

I don't blame them, some people like office politics and they would do anything if you were not the same 'gang' as them. Some people would do anything to survive. Anyway people are selfish in some way.

I know it is hard to be appreciated by others and I don't want anything from you all. If I want respect and trust from you all, I will earn it myself. This is the correct way.

However you no need to worry so much about me. As a contractor, my task is to contribute to Motorola; I was paid to work here. And I will devote myself to the task assigned to me and not cause any trouble to you.


Trust
Trust in sociology is a relationship between people. It involves the suspension of disbelief that one person will have towards another person or idea. It especially involves having one person thinking that the other person or idea is benevolent, competent / good, or honest / true.
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trust_(sociology)

[relationship] These are the types that GENERALLY turn women off

These are the types that GENERALLY turn women off.
Unsuccessful Archetypes:
- Hippie (Careless about grooming and clothing)
- Nerd (Not socially educated or charming)
- Redneck ('nuff said)
- Prejudice, Ignorant and Proud (again, speaks for itself)
- Insecure and Needy (Clingy and smothering physically and emotionally)
- Afraid man (Won't take risks in life and go for it)
- Mommy's boy (Needs mom's approval for everything, won't grow up)
- Argument man (Argues with everything all the time)
- Unattractive on purpose (This can work if you like women who are the same)

[relationship] The Eight Personality Types of Men Who Are Successful With Women

The Eight Personality Types of Men Who Are Successful With Women

Lover Personalities:
1. Bad Boy (danger) Someone who's dangerous and thrilling to be around.
2. Adventurer (fun) Someone who's fun and exciting to be around.
3. Seducer (sex) Someone who is sensual and sexy and makes her feel sexy.
4. Artist (Musician, Poet) (emotion) Someone who moves her emotions and is enigmatic and complex.

Provider Personalities:
5. Successful Guy (means) Someone who provides a great lifestyle and stability.
6. Daddy (control) Someone who tells her what to do and controls her.
7. Regular Guy (loyalty) Someone who is down to earth, loyal and stable.
8. Ass Kissing Guy (her boy) Someone who gives her whatever she wants.

[tech] Some november tips and tricks

Want to know how much your CPU consumes power?
100w? 200w? 300w?
You can do so now with the below link
http://www.jscustompcs.com/power_supply/


Want to bench mark your hard disk? Or plan to get another high performance hard disk? Check the link below
http://www.storagereview.com/comparison.html


To tweak up your sluggish broadband speed (Windows XP)
Start -> Run -> type gpedit.msc -> Local Computer Policy -> Administrative Templates -> Network -> QOS Packet Scheduler on left window -> Limit Reservable Bandwidth -> Setting tab -> select Enable -> set Bandwidth Limit % to '0'-> Reboot.

[tech] Solutions to ''Slow System Startup''

This list is "Designed for Windows XP", although I didn't receive the logo.... :-)

1. Defrag your hard drive. Use the built in XP defragmenter (dfrg.msc). It's the only one that properly optimizes your system's prefetching to speed up boot time.

2. Go to Microsoft's website and download BootVis.exe. It will optimize your prefetching even further than the built in defragmenter. Use both to get the best results: dfrg.msc first, then BootVis.exe->Tools menu->Optimize. Also, you can use it to benchmark your boot time before and after system tweaks and software installations.

3. Go to Start->Run... and type or paste "Rundll32.exe advapi32.dll,ProcessIdleTasks". This will start a built in optimization routine that runs in the System Idle Process and shows up as "rundll32.exe" in task manager. It normally runs automatically every 3 days. It will run for 15 mins to half an hour, so don't try to do anything too intensive while it's running. If you get sick of it running, you should probably log off or restart to be safe, rather than killing the process.

4. Delete anything that you don't need in the Start->Programs->Startup folder, and in the Registry under HKLM->Software->Microsoft->Windows->Run and HKCU->Software->Microsoft->Windows->Run.

5. Go to Start->Control Panel->Administrative Tools->Services or go to Start->Run... and type "services.msc" to display services running on your machine. About 1/3 should be automatic, 1/3 should be manual, and 1/3 should be disabled, IMHO. If you don't know which to change, search google for "XP services" and read one of the many WebPages that describe each service.

6. Use a partition manager to create a separate partition for your swap-file. Set its size to about 2.5 times the amount of physical RAM you have. You can do this by right-clicking my computer and selecting Properties->Advanced tab->Performance section->Settings button->Advanced tab again->Virtual Memory section->Change button. Whew! They don't make that one easy to get to. Just don't completely remove your swap file, because your system might not boot after that, unless you have a lot of physical RAM.

7. Repeat steps 1-3.
Ideally, XP on a clean install should boot in about 12 seconds from the time that you see the XP logo to useable (can open a program). With all my device drivers and third-party utilities, the best I can acheive so far is 18 seconds on my Dell. Don't use Norton SpeedDisk!--It may slow your XP system boot time by about 6 seconds.
I have messed around with this a lot, to say the least, and I plan to build some utilities to make it easier and give them away for free in the future. Wish I had a web address to post here, but I'll be around here in the future, so check back in this discussion forum if you are really interested, or look for my utilities in the next few months on download.com in the Utilities section.
Good luck, Ben

Solutions to ''Slow System Startup''
Friday, January 3, 2003 at 1:51 pm
Posted by Ben
http://www.annoyances.org/exec/forum/winxp/n1041630673

Guilty Conscience - EMINEM

EMINEM
"Guilty Conscience"
(feat. Dr. Dre)

[sound of static]

[announcer]
Meet Eddie, twenty-three years old.
Fed up with life and the way things are going,
he decides to rob a liquor store.
("I can't take this no more, I can't take it no more homes")
But on his way in, he has a sudden change of heart.
And suddenly, his conscience comes into play...
("Shit is mine, I gotta do this.. gotta do this")

[Dr. Dre]
Alright, stop! (Huh?)
Now before you walk in the door of this liquor store
and try to get money out the drawer
You better think of the consequence (But who are you?)
I'm your motherfuckin conscience

[Eminem]
That's nonsense!
Go in and gaffle the money and run to one of your aunt's cribs
And borrow a damn dress, and one of her blonde wigs
Tell her you need a place to stay
You'll be safe for days if you shave your legs with Renee's razor blade

[Dr. Dre]
Yeah but if it all goes through like it's supposed to
The whole neighborhood knows you and they'll expose you
Think about it before you walk in the door first
Look at the store clerk, she's older than George Burns

[Eminem]
Fuck that! Do that shit! Shoot that bitch!
Can you afford to blow this shit? Are you that rich?
Why you give a fuck if she dies? Are you that bitch?
Do you really think she gives a fuck if you have kids?

[Dr. Dre]
Man, don't do it, it's not worth it to risk it! (You're right!)
Not over this shit (Stop!) Drop the biscuit (I will!)
Don't even listen to Slim yo, he's bad for you
(You know what Dre? I don't like your attitude..)

[sound of static]

("It's alright c'mon, just come in here for a minute")
("Mmm, I don't know!")
("Look baby..")
("Damn!")
("Yo, it's gonna be alright, right?")
("Well OK..")

[announcer]
Meet Stan, twenty-one years old. ("Give me a kiss!")
After meeting a young girl at a rave party,
things start getting hot and heavy in an upstairs bedroom.
Once again, his conscience comes into play... ("Shit!")

[Eminem]
Now listen to me, while you're kissin her cheek
and smearin her lipstick, I slipped this in her drink
Now all you gotta do is nibble on this little bitch's earlobe..
(Yo! This girl's only fifteen years old
You shouldn't take advantage of her, that's not fair)
Yo, look at her bush.. does it got hair? (Uh huh!)
Fuck this bitch right here on the spot bare
Til she passes out and she forgot how she got there
(Man, ain't you ever seen that one movie _Kids_?)
No, but I seen the porno with SunDoobiest!
(Shit, you wanna get hauled off to jail?)
Man fuck that, hit that shit raw dawg and bail..

[sound of static]
[pickup idling, radio playing]

[announcer]
Meet Grady, a twenty-nine year old construction worker.
After coming home from a hard day's work,
he walks in the door of his trailer park home
to find his wife in bed with another man.
("WHAT THE FUCK?!?!")
("Grady!!")

[Dr. Dre]
Alright calm down, relax, start breathin..

[Eminem]
Fuck that shit, you just caught this bitch cheatin
While you at work she's with some dude tryin to get off?!
FUCK slittin her throat, CUT THIS BITCH'S HEAD OFF!!!

[Dr. Dre]
Wait! What if there's an explanation for this shit?
(What? She tripped? Fell? Landed on his dick?!)
Alright Shady, maybe he's right Grady
But think about the baby before you get all crazy

[Eminem]
Okay! Thought about it, still wanna stab her?
Grab her by the throat, get your daughter and kidnap her?
That's what I did, be smart, don't be a retard
You gonna take advice from somebody who slapped DEE BARNES??!

[Dr. Dre]
What'chu say? (What's wrong? Didn't think I'd remember?)
I'ma kill you motherfucker!

[Eminem]
Uhhh-aahh! Temper temper!
Mr. Dre? Mr. N.W.A.?
Mr. AK comin' straight outta Compton y'all better make way?
How in the fuck you gonna tell this man not to be violent?

[Dr. Dre]
Cause he don't need to go the same route that I went
Been there, done that.. aw fuck it...
What am I sayin? Shoot em both Grady, where's your gun at?

[gun fires, is cocked, and re-fired]

SHARING: Enhancing Relationships

SHARING: Enhancing Relationships
TRUST is a very important factor for all relationships. When trust is broken, it is the end of the relationship. Lack of trust leads to suspicion, suspicion generates anger, anger causes enmity and enmity may result in separation.

A telephone operator told me that one day she received a phone call. She answered, "Public Utilities Board." There was silence. She repeated, "PUB." There was still no answer. When she was going to cut off the line, she heard a lady's voice, "Oh, so this is PUB. Sorry, I got the number from my Husband's pocket but I do not know whose number it is."

Without mutual trust, just imagine what will happen to the couple if the telephone operator answered with just "hello" instead of "PUB".



NO POINTING FINGERS
A man asked his father-in-law, "Many people praised you for a successful marriage. Could you please share with me your secret?"
The father-in-law answered in a smile, "Never criticize your wife for her shortcomings or when she does something wrong. Always bear in mind that because of her shortcomings and weaknesses, she could not find a better husband than you."

We all look forward to being loved and respected. Many people are afraid of losing face. Generally, when a person makes a mistake, he would look around to find a scapegoat to point the finger at. This is the start of a war. We should always remember that when we point one finger at a person, the other four fingers are pointing at ourselves.

If we forgive the others, others will ignore our mistake too.



CREATING PERFECT RELATIONSHIPS?
A person visited the government matchmaker for marriage, SDU, and requested "I am looking for a spouse. Please help me to find a suitable one." The SDU officer said, "Your requirements, please." "Oh, good looking, polite, humorous, sporty, knowledgeable, and good in singing and dancing. Willing to accompany me the whole day at home during my leisure hour, if I don't go out. Telling me interesting stories when I need companion for conversation and be silent when I want to rest." The officer listened carefully and replied, "I understand you need television."

There is a saying that a perfect match can only be found between a blind wife and a deaf husband, because the blind wife cannot see the faults of the husband and the deaf husband cannot hear the nagging of the wife. Many couples are blind and deaf at the courting stage and dream of perpetual perfect relationship. Unfortunately, when the excitement of love wears off, they wake up and discover that marriage is not a bed of roses. The nightmare begins.



NO OVERPOWERING
Many relationships fail because one party tries to overpower another, or demands too much. People in love tend to think that love will conquer all and their spouses will change the bad habits after marriage. Actually, this is not the case. There is a Chinese saying which carries the meaning that "It is easier to reshape a mountain or a river than a person's character."

It is not easy to change. Thus, having high expectation on changing the spouse character will cause disappointment and unpleasantness.

It would be less painful to change ourselves and lower our expectations..



RIGHT SPEECH
There is a Chinese saying which carries the meaning that "A speech will either prosper or ruin a nation." Many relationships break off because of wrong speech. When a couple is too close with each other, we always forget mutual respect and courtesy. We may say anything without considering if it would hurt the other party.

A friend and her millionaire husband visited their construction site. A worker who wore a helmet saw her and shouted," I, Emily! Remember me? We used to date in the secondary school." On the way home, her millionaire husband teased her, "Luckily you married me. Otherwise you will be the wife of a construction worker." She answered,"You should appreciate that you married me. Otherwise, he will be the millionaire and not you."

Frequently exchanging these remarks plants the seed for a bad relationship. It's like a broken egg - cannot be reversed.



PERSONAL PERCEPTION
Different people have different perception. One man's meat could be another man's poison. A couple bought a donkey from the market. On the way home, a boy commented, "Very stupid. Why neither of them rides on the donkey?" Upon hearing that, the husband let the wife ride on the donkey. He walked besides them. Later, an old man saw it and commented, "The husband is the head of family. How can the wife ride on the donkey while the husband is on foot?" Hearing this, the wife quickly got down and let the husband ride on the donkey.

Further on the way home, they met an old Lady. She commented, "How can the man ride on the donkey but let the wife walk. He is no gentleman."
The husband thus quickly asked the wife to join him on the donkey. Then, they met a young man. He commented, "Poor donkey, how can you hold up the weight of two persons. They are cruel to you." Hearing that, the husband and wife immediately climbed down from the donkey and carried it on their shoulders.

It seems to be the only choice left. Later, on a narrow bridge, the donkey was frightened and struggled. They lost their balance and fell into the river. You can never have everyone praise you, nor will everyone condemn you. Never in the past, not at present, and never will be in the future.

Thus, do not be too bothered by others words if our conscience is clear..



BE PATIENT
This is a true story which happened in the States. A man came out of his home to admire his new truck. To his puzzlement, his three-year-old son was happily hammering dents into the shiny paint of the truck. The man ran to his son, knocked him away, and hammered the little boy's hands into pulp as punishment. When the father calmed down, he rushed his son to the hospital.

Although the doctor tried desperately to save the crushed bones, he finally had to amputate the fingers from both the boy's hands. When the boy woke up from the surgery & saw his bandaged stubs, he innocently said, "Daddy, I'm sorry about your truck." Then he asked, "But when are my fingers going to grow back?" The father went home & committed Suicide.

Think about this story the next time someone steps on your feet or u wish to take revenge. Think first before u lose your patience with someone u love. Trucks can be repaired... Broken bones & hurt feelings often can't. Too often we fail to recognize the difference between the person and the performance. We forget that forgiveness is greater than revenge.

People make mistakes. We are allowed to make mistakes. But the actions we take while in a rage will haunt us forever.

[relationship] Attributes women loath

Men who seek women's validation:
Women hate men who need their acceptance or validation. I used to be this sort of man. I used to worry about getting validation from a woman--'is she going to like the place I am taking her?' etc.
This is a huge women repeller.
Instead, women enjoy a man strong enough to get validation in other ways besides through her.

Men who have a weak sense of reality:
This is similar to men who seek validation from women. This is a man who is unsure of himself and unsure in his beliefs about the world. So if you are the sort of man who does not have a sense of what acceptable behavior from women is, or does not have his own sense of what is important to him, or does not have his own sense of what is cool and uncooI, you are in trouble.
Furthermore, if you are the sort of man who has a sense of these things but feels intimidated to assert them to women, you are in trouble.
If a man is weak and let's a woman or other people define these things for him, she will loose interest.
Put simply, women are attracted to men who can think for themselves and are assertive about what they think and like. And not being able to think for you or be assertive is a huge women repeller.

So if this is a problem for you, you need to start working on being the sort of man who has standards, has his own take on the world, knows what he likes, and has the guts to let other people know what these things are.

[relationship] Qualities of men - Prize?

Some of the qualities of men who are the PRIZE are:

1. Taking a strong lead
2. Having Standards
3. Making her come into your world
4. Making her accommodate you
5. Being challenging
6. Having a sense of humor
7. Being vulnerable
8. Displaying costly signals
9. Being comfortable with yourself
10. Being a Dandy
11. Being a Rake
12. Being a Coquette

[relationship] How to loose a woman?

How to loose a woman?

Women will often times try to take control of the lead to test how sure of himself a man is. If they discover that he is unsure of himself or has a weak sense of self, they will often times run the other way or walk all over him. Nonetheless, this is a sure way to loose a woman.

The Bad Guy Notice

I got this from a book I was reading, thought it was funny.

The Bad Guy Notice:
This book is copyright 2001, with all rights reserved. It is illegal to copy, distribute, or create derivative works from this book in whole or in part, or to contribute to the copying, distribution, or creating of derivative works of this book.

When you purchased this book, you agreed to the statement on the bottom of the homepage of my website that stated:

"©2001, All Rights Reserved. If you try to copy, steal, or distribute all or any part of my book or this web page without permission, I will have my attorney contact you and make you wish that you'd never had such a stupid idea in your life. Count on it. By purchasing this book, you agree to the following: You understand that the information contained on this page and in this book is an opinion, and it should be used for personal entertainment purposes only. You are responsible for your own behavior, and none of this book is to be considered legal or personal advice."

Uniform is same style of clothing.

Uniform is same style of clothing.

A uniform is a set of standard clothing worn by members of an organization whilst participating in that organization's activity. People performing religious activities have often worn standard costumes since the dawn of recorded history. Other early examples of uniforms include the clothing of the armies of the Roman Empire and other civilizations.
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Uniform

Too bad I was too sleepy to notice that I didn't wear uniform to work today. I only manage to notice it when I saw a motorcyclist wearing the uniform driving pass me (I am a slow and cautious driver), I was thinking "Hey, that guy is working in same factory as me." Then I was looking at myself, "where is my uniform?? I am in a hot soup." Kind of panic, I slow down and try to figure a way to overcome this. I got 3 options

1. Drive back to my house and get the uniform. But I will get stuck in traffic jam for 1 or 2 hour and late for work.
2. Go to office wearing casually as I am now. Got a meeting later, so the risk is I will get a scolding from my supervisor. Not to mention all those weird stare at my casual cloths from other co worker.
3. Telephone and try to borrow uniform from my colleague nearby.

Choice 3 seems like a good idea except most of them are still sleeping at the moment (7.30am in the morning). What should I do?
Choices and more choices… I might as well drive to where they stay and wait there.

Maybe I got luck today, finally manage to borrow a uniform from them and I got this opportunity to write this in my blog now.
Below is what my uniform looks like, however the guy in picture is not me, I just found it from the Internet.

Positive thinking

Positive thinking is like this:

"A little bird in the sky,
You look up and it shits in your eye.
You don't mind and you don't cry.
You just thank GOD that cows don't fly. "

Attitude is a key concept in social psychology. In academic psychology parlance, attitudes are positive or negative views of an "attitude object": a person, behaviour, or event. Research has shown that people can also be "ambivalent" towards a target, meaning that they simultaneously possess a positive and a negative attitude towards it.

[relationship] How to cope with break up?

I was wondering, how do some or all of you cope with break up? And what about all those uncertain relationship, complicated yet no remedy relationship.

Did some research and I manage to find some book about it. It’s not that comprehensive but at least the book would be useful for some of you out there. Below are 3 books that you can expect to find in most of the bookshelf in your regular bookstore.

# He's Just Not That Into You: The No-Excuses Truth to Understanding Guys by Greg Behrendt
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/068987474X/ref=pd_sim_b_1/102-9308929-6160132?%5Fencoding=UTF8&v=glance

# He's Just Not That Into You : Your Daily Wake-up Call by Greg Behrendt
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/1416909532/ref=pd_sim_b_3/102-9308929-6160132?%5Fencoding=UTF8&v=glance

# He's Just Not That into You: 2006 Day to Day Calendar by Greg Behrendt
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/0740755277/ref=pd_sim_b_5/102-9308929-6160132?%5Fencoding=UTF8&v=glance


But I would like to recommend the following book.

It's Called a Breakup Because It's Broken : The Smart Girl's Break-Up Buddy
by Greg Behrendt, Amiira Ruotola-Behrendt
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0767921852/102-9308929-6160132?v=glance&n=283155&v=glance

Their book includes Seven Commandments. Here are three of them:

Don't see him or talk to him for 60 days: "It's the same thing as breaking an addiction, Greg Behrendt said. "You wouldn't ask an alcoholic to dry out in a bar. Get away from the person who will ultimately bring you the most amount of pain for 60 days to get perspective."

Get yourself a breakup buddy: "Again, very much like a sponsor in AA," Greg Behrendt said. "You're going to use your friend, right? Let's make it official. Don't wear out your friendship. Don't overload your friends. Make it official. Make it a thing you're doing together. Say, 'Listen. I need your help. When I go to a bar, I want you to take my phone. I want to call you instead of him. When I go to return his stuff, you take it instead of me.' And the break-up buddy says, 'We only talk about it an hour.' "

Get rid of his stuff and the things that remind you of him: "I'm not saying burn it," Ruotola-Behrendt said. "Although, if that helps you, that's your prerogative. But we say to make three boxes: one for the memories you'd like to hang on to for later; stuff that goes back to him in the second box; and then trash in the third." She advises giving the first and second to the break-up buddy, "so later you can decide and you can get it back."

The above is just a glimpse of that is inside the book. Now I am waiting my hands to get hold of one copy in local book store.

[relationship] The Best Break-Up Letter

Dear Susan :

I know the counsellor said we shouldn't contact each other during our "cooling off" period, but I couldn't wait anymore. The day you left, I swore I'd never talk to you again. But that was just the wounded little boy in me talking. Still, I never wanted to be the first one to make contact.

In my fantasies, it was always you who would come crawling back to me. I guess my pride needed that. But now I see that my pride's cost me a lot of things. I'm tired of pretending I don't miss you. I don't care about looking bad anymore. I don't care who makes the first move as long as one of us does. Maybe it's time we let our hearts speak as loudly as our hurt. And this is what my heart says...

"There's no one like you, Susan." I look for you in the eyes and breasts of every woman I see, but they're not you. They're not even close. Two weeks ago, I met this girl at Ithaca Bar and brought her home with me. I don't say this to hurt you, but just to illustrate the depth of my desperation. She was young, maybe 19, with one of those perfect bodies that only youth and maybe a childhood spent ice skating can give you. I mean, just a perfect body. Jugs you wouldn't believe and an ass like a tortoise shell. Every man's dream, right? But as I sat on the couch being blown by this stunner, I thought, look at the stuff we've made important in our lives. It's all so superficial. What does a perfect body mean?

Does it make her better in bed? Well, in this case, yes. But you see what I'm getting at. Does it make her a better person? Does she have a better heart than my moderately attractive Susan? I doubt it. And I'd never really thought of that before. I Don't know, maybe I'm just growing up a little.

Later, after I'd tossed her about a half a pint of throat yogurt, I found myself thinking, "why do I feel so drained and empty?" It wasn't just her flawless technique or her slutty, shameless hunger, but something else. Some fucking feeling of loss. Why did it feel so incomplete? And then it hit me.

It didn't feel the same because you weren't there, Susan, to watch. Do you know what I mean? Nothing feels the same without you. Jesus, Susan, I'm just going crazy without you. And everything I do just reminds me of you.

Do you remember Carol, that single mom we met in Upper Side last year? Well, she dropped by last week with a pan of lasagna. She said she figured I wasn't eating right without a woman around. I didn't know what she meant till later, but that's not the real story. Anyway, we had a few glasses of wine and the next thing you know we're banging away in our old bedroom. And this tart's a total monster in the sack. She's giving me everything, you know like a real woman does when she's not hung up about her weight or her career and whether the kids can hear us. And all of a sudden she spots that tilting mirror on your grandmother's old vanity. So she puts it on the floor and we straddle it, right, so we can watch ourselves. And it's totally hot, but it makes me sad too. 'Cause I can't help thinking, "Why didn't Susan ever put the mirror on the floor? We've had this old vanity for what, 14 years, and we never used it as a sex aid."

Saturday, your sister drops by with my copy of the restraining order. I mean, Vicky's just a kid and all, but she's got a pretty good head on her shoulders and she's been a real friend to me during this painful time.

She's given me lots of good counsel about you and about women in general. She's pulling for us to get back together, Susan, She really is. So we're drinking in a hot bath and talking about happier times. Here's this teenage girl with the same DNA as you and all I can do is think of how much she looked like you when you were 18. And that just about makes me cry. And then it turns out Vicky's really into the whole anal thing and that gets me to thinking about how many times I pressured you about trying it and how that probably fuelled some of the bitterness between us.

But do you see how even then, when I'm thrusting inside your baby sister's cinnamon ring, all I can do is think of you? It's true, Susan. In your heart you know it. Don't you think we could start over? Just wipe out all the grievances and start fresh? I think we can.

If you feel the same please, please, please let me know, otherwise, can you let me know where the remote control is.

John Doe

[relationship] 10 Signs That It's Time To Break Up

10 Signs That It's Time To Break Up
Sometimes, good things end. That’s just the way life is. Sometimes, bad things continue due to neglect or fear. This ISN’T the way life should be!

I continue to tell people, the problem isn’t that there are too many divorces – there are too many marriages! So many people hook up with partners that are (or become) unhealthy for them, then find that they can’t bring themselves to break it off – sometimes out of fear of being alone, sometimes through convincing by their friends or family, sometimes through concern of how they will look, sometimes through simple neglect, etc.

When should a relationship break up? Simple: when it no longer provides benefit to one or both partners. In other words, if you aren’t getting what you want or need from being with someone, or if you recognize that your partner isn’t getting what they want or need it’s time to move on.

I’ve had some people say to me, “Isn’t that a little selfish – what about the person you’re dumping?” To this I answer, “How can it be good for someone to stay with a person that doesn’t want to be with him or her?” After all, how low does your self-esteem (let alone your self-respect) have to be to want to do this? It is by far much healthier to go about finding the relationship that works for you – that gives you what you need, than to apathetically cling to something that isn’t fulfilling. Life is too short for this, and you deserve better.

So, how do you know when to break off your relationship? Here are 10 signs to watch for. Note that most people encounter one, two or more of these things periodically. However if you’re finding that you experience more than a few consistently – over a longer period, it’s probably time to move on:

10. You no longer look forward to spending time alone with your partner.
You may still have a good sex life (or not!) but actually talking to your partner seems like a chore. If spending time alone with your partner seems like a prison sentence you may be up for a parole.

9. You begin comparing your partner to others.
This is particularly true when other people seem more appealing to you. We all find others – often those we don’t have – attractive. If however, you find that you’re comparing specific traits – a person’s voice, their neatness, they way they carry themselves, etc., against others; especially things your partner can’t change - you should re-evaluate your relationship.

8. You criticize or “micro-manage” your partner
If you’re always concerned that your partner’s socks aren’t exactly right for his pants, or that she wears too much make-up, or that he or she just can’t seem to take their responsibilities seriously, don’t look at them – look at yourself. People that are in love tend to look beyond minor annoyances to the bigger picture. If you’re having trouble doing this you may want to work on your exit plan.

7. You start trying to change your partner
Many people fall in love with people that excite them, but find that this excitement isn’t good for them in the long term. On the other hand, they may find someone “stable” that doesn’t provide enough variety in their relationship. If you find that you’re constantly trying to convert your partner from the person you fell in love with, it may be time to bolt.

6. You re-connect with ex lovers
It’s one thing to send an ex-girlfriend a birthday card. It is entirely another to take her out for dinner and a movie “just to catch up”. The trick here is to be honest about your motivations. If you had the chance to sleep with him or her, would you? Are you looking for approval or an ego-boost from him or her? Have you forgotten why you broke up in the first place?

5. His or her jokes are no longer funny
Of course, you may have heard them 1,000 times, but people in love tend to look beyond this repetitiveness. They see that their partner is being humorous, not how funny something is or isn’t.

4. You’re doing all the giving – or all the getting
Relationships are about mutual benefit. If one partner is benefiting over the other, the relationship isn’t healthy. This doesn’t mean that everything should be exactly balanced. For example, just because one partner spends $50 on a birthday present, that the other should spend exactly that amount. Nor does it mean that both partners should always split a dinner check. If one person pays all the time, and the other doesn’t at least cook a few meals, there is something wrong – and unhealthy about the relationship.

3. You constantly find ways to include others in your activities
Always including others indicates that you’re not looking forward to being alone with your partner. Of course, you need time with your friends, but if you never have private time, or the only time you’re alone is when you’re having sex, perhaps the problem is in the company.

2. Your friends no longer like being around you when you’re with your partner
Your friends don’t have to dislike your partner – perhaps they don’t like what affect your partner has on YOU! Consider that your relationship with your friends is at least as important in the long run as your relationship with your partner. In fact, it may be MORE important as they will see you as you really are, and will be there even if he or she isn’t – IF you treat them right!

1. You no longer feel good about yourself
At first, this seems like a strange warning sign about your relationship, but think about how you felt when you first hooked up with your partner. You felt great – about yourself and your world. If this is now lacking where it was there before, you may want to look at your relationship.

Best regards...
Dr. Neder